WELCOME to Monday April 16, 2012.  Office Lingo…. 
Activate: To make carbons and add more names to the memo.
Advanced Design: Beyond the comprehension of the ad agency’s copywriters.
All New: Parts not interchangeable with existing models.
Approved: Needs revising
Automatic: That which you cannot repair yourself.
Channels: The trails left by interoffice memos.
Clarify:To fill in the background with so many details that the  foreground goes underground.
Conference: A place where conversation is substituted for the loneliness  of thought and the dreariness of labor.
Confidential Memo: No time to photocopy for the whole office.
Consultant: Someone who borrows your watch to tell you what time it is and  then walks away with the watch.
Forwarded For Your Consideration: You hold the bag for a while.
FYI: Found yesterday, interested?
In Conference: Nobody can find him/her.
Let’s Get Together On This: I’m assuming you’re as confused as I.
Note & Initial: I’m not taking the fall for this myself.
Policy: We can hide behind this.
Please See Me: Come down to my office. I’m lonely.
Top Priority: It may be stupid but the boss wants it.
We Are Taking A Survey: We need more time to think of an answer or we  can’t find
anyone willing to be responsible for this.
Will Advise In Due Course: If we figure it out, we’ll let you know. That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you  do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY
To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be
hopelessly in love with spring.  ~George Santayana

Happiness is an  attitude.  We either make ourselves miserable, or happy
and strong.  The amount  of work is the same.  ~Francesca Reigler

If you don’t like something  change it; if you can’t change it, change the
way you think about it.  ~Mary  Engelbreit

So often time it happens, we all live our life in chains,  and we never
even know we have the key.  ~The Eagles, “Already  Gone”

He who has so little knowledge of human nature as to seek  happiness
by changing anything but his own disposition will waste his life in
ruitless efforts.  ~Samuel Johnson

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
A certain English lady visited Switzerland and was having difficulty finding
a room, soshe asked the local schoolmaster to help her. After a satisfactory  room had been found,
she returned to her home and did some packing. Suddenly, it occured to her that she hadn’t
noticed a W.C. (in England, the  toilet is called a Water Closet), so she wrote the schoolmaster
about the W.C. The Schoolmaster, not knowing the meaning, asked the parish priest and
together they decided that it must mean “Wayside Chapel.” He wrote her the  following letter:

Dear Madame, It is my pleasure to inform you that there is a W.C. just 9 miles from your  home, in the center of a grove of pine trees. It seats 229 people, and it is  open on Thursdays and Sundays. This is an unfortunate situation if you are in  the habit of going regularly. You will, no doubt, be glad to hear that some  people bring their lunches and make a day of it. I would especially recommend Thursdays, for then there is an Organ  accompaniment. The accoustics in the W.C. are excellent; even the most delicate  sound can be heard. My son was married in the W.C. and there was such a rush for seats that 10  people had to sit in the same seat. The looks on their faces were very  interesting. My wife is sickly but dedicated. She doesn’t go regularly, and she hasn’t  gone for nearly a year. I will be glad to reserve a seat in the W.C. for you, where you will be seen  and heard by everyone. Hoping I have been of some assistance.
Sincerely yours, The Schoolmaster

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? ‘You know what the Queen said? I had balls, I’d be a King.’   Answer: Mean Streets. Said by Charlie.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from???
‘It’s okay. I wouldn’t remember me either.’

Friday’s Quizzler is……….
Decapitate me and all becomes equal. Then truncate me and I become second. Cut me front and back and I become two less than I started. What am I? Answer: The word Seven. seven even (equal) eve  (2nd person, according to the Bible) v   (Roman numeral five; two less than seven) Now you get it 😀

Monday’s Quizzlers is……….
Below are 3 pairs of words. Find the words that fit in the middle of each pair of words to create two new words, one front-ended and one back-ended.  Example: EVER – ______ – HORN Answer: EVER – GREEN – HORN
1. MOLE – ________ – TOP 2. DEER – ________ – TIGHT 3. WOOD – _______ – HEAD

 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/