WELCOME to Friday September 21, 2012.  Daffynitions……

 Abdicate: To give up all hope of having a flat stomach. 

 

Adminisphere: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. 

 

Administrivia: All of the annoying little tasks associated with your job.   

 

Adult: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. 

 

Aflockalypse: When all those birds fell out of the sky.  

 

Aibohphobia: Fear of palindromes.  

 

Aquadextrous: Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub tap on and off with your toes.  

 

Arachnoleptic fit: The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web. 

 

Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonald’s. 

 

Aromatic: An automatic crossbow. 

 

Assmosis: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard. 

 

Avoidable: What a bullfighter tries to do. 

 

Balderdash: A rapidly receding hairline. 

 

Baloney: Some hemlines fall here. 

 

Barbecue: A line of people waiting for a haircut.  

 

Beauty Parlor: A place where women curl up and dye. 

 

Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out. 

 

Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible. 

 

Bouyant: A male insect.  

 

Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. 

 

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people, and whatever you do, 

don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman! 

 

 

QUOTES OF THE DAY

“I read that the Apple executive who designed the iPhone just bought a new $17 million mansion in California. And if there’s any justice at all, he’ll find out the new house isn’t compatible with any of the furniture from his last house.” -Jimmy Fallon

 

“A lot of people make money off of weddings, such as caterers, photographers, and divorce lawyers.” -Craig Ferguson

 

“Arnold Schwarzenegger has written a new book about his affair with his Hispanic housekeeper, and the book is actually called ‘Total Recall.’ In response, she’s written a book about their affair called ‘Alien vs. Predator.'” -Conan O’Brien

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….  

On the way back from a Cub Scout meeting, my grandson asked my son the question. “Dad, I know that babies come from mommies’ tummies, but how do they get there in the first place?” he asked innocently. After my son hemmed and hawed awhile, my grandson finally spoke up in disgust. “You don’t have to make something up, Dad. It’s OK if you don’t know the answer.” 

 

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ How much movie trivia can you answer?

What movie is this quote from??? “Well, I see you’re smoking pot now. I think using psychotropic drugs is a very positive example to set for our daughter.” “You’re one to talk, you bloodless, money-grubbing freak.”   

 

Answer: American Beauty! In this scene Carolyn Burnham (Annette Bening) is just starting to garden when she notices the smell of marijuana coming from her garage. She opens the garage door and confronts her husband, Lester (Kevin Spacey), who is lying on a weight bench in the garage. Lester is unsatisfied with his life and is going through a mid-life crisis, but has just discovered he is attracted to his daughter’s attractive, young friend Angela Hayes (Mena Suvari) and has embarked on a program to get himself in shape to impress her. Lester and his materialistic realtor wife are constantly sniping at each other and this scene is typical of their conversations. Carolyn says line one and Lester comes back with line two.

 

In the 2000 Academy Awards, “American Beauty” won five Oscars, including Best Picture. Kevin Spacey won Best Actor in a Leading Role. Annette Bening was nominated for Best Actress in a Leading Role but lost to Hilary Swank in “Boys Don’t Cry”. The famous image from this movie of red rose petals on a bed has frequently been used in many other posters, article pictures, etc. 

 

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?

What movie is this quote from???  “Is Lonnegan after you, too?” “I don’t know. Haven’t seen anybody.”

“You never do, kid.”

 

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……….

Use the 26 letters of the alphabet to complete the ten words below, replacing each underscore with a letter. Each letter can only be used once.  1. _IRA_E  2. _ _RRO_  3. _OR_ _L_  4. _O_ _H  5. _R_T_ER  6. E_I_MA  7. _UIR_

8. _IN_E_  9. A_UR_  10. _ _TER  

 

ANSWER: 1. PIRATE  2. MIRROR  3. WORLDLY  4. VOUCH  5. BROTHER  6. ENIGMA  7. QUIRK

8. JINXES  9. AZURE  10. AFTER    

 

Friday’s Quizzlers is……….

 Five veterans were sitting around a bar swapping war stories. From the information provided, determine each veteran’s branch of service, the year each was born, and each person’s current career.

 

1. The teacher was born in 1971.

 

2. The architect was born the year before Art Smith.

 

3. Susan Wilson, who served in the Coast Guard, is a year younger than the veteran who is now a nurse.

 

4. The Navy veteran, who wasn’t born in 1970, isn’t Mary Jones who now practices law.

 

5. The Army vet, who has published several books about the war, is neither Bill Johnson nor the oldest of the group.

 

6. The former Marine, who was born in 1969, isn’t Art Smith or Mary Jones.

 

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers& Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/   MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT: http://www.slampi.org. http://www.hopeBUILD.org. http://www.wcscatering.com.  www.schoons.com.  www.awj-Law.com., http://www.greengrassgroundsgroup.com. http://www.cleancomedyguy.com.