Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to THURSDAY MAY 7, 2020
 
Here’s the Story…. 

This is a repeat titled the Differences between men and women. I had to run it again
because some of the guys felt that the women just didn’t get the first time!  Remember don’t hate the messenger!😁

1. NAMES
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and
Scrappy.
2. EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of
them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
3. MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need, but it’s on sale.
4. BATHROOMS
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.
The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these
items.
5. ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that… is the beginning of a new
argument.
6.CATS
Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren’t looking, men kick cats.
 
7. DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get
the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
8. FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
9. SUCCESS
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
10. MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and

she does.

Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY people, stay inside, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!
Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
________________________________________________________
Quotes of the Day 
“There’s a new comic book coming out about Arnold
Schwarzenegger’s life. In the comic, Arnold battles

his life-long nemesis: words.” – Jimmy Fallon
________________________________________________________
“I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You
couldn’t park anywhere near the place.”
– Steven Wright
________________________________________________________
“She got her looks from her father.
He’s a plastic surgeon.” – Groucho Marx
________________________________________________________
“Well, a new study has found that having a cat
makes you 40 percent less likely to die of a heart
attack. Not that the cat could care less either way, really.” –Jay Leno
________________________________________________________
“A company is now making a cell phone that allows
 you to talk to your dog. It enables you to talk to your dog.
The way it works is that first you have to be insane.”

–Dave Letterman

________________________________________________________
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
Confucius Says:

Girl who make love in tomb may soon become mummy.
Wise man never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Man who drop watch in toilet have crappy time.
Man trapped in pantry have himself in jam.
Women take to good hearted men. Also from.
Man who pass gas in church must sit in own pew.
Man who shoot off mouth, expect to lose face.

Man with big mouth, beware of foot.

________________________________________________________
 
 
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
“… I could shoot all the blue jays I wanted, if I could hit ’em, but to remember it was a sin to kill a mockingbird…Well, I reckon because mockingbirds don’t do anything but make music for us to enjoy. They don’t eat people’s gardens, don’t nest in the corncribs, they don’t do one thing but just sing their hearts out for us.”

Answer:   To Kill a Mockingbird!

Based on the novel by Harper Lee, ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’ depicted life in a small southern town in the USA, focusing on events in the lives of Scout and Jem Finch, including their father’s involvement as defense lawyer in a case in which a black man was accused of raping a white woman, with all the turbulence such a trial inevitably brought to the town.
The role of Atticus Finch was a tour-de-force for Gregory Peck, who won his first Best Actor Oscar for his fifth nomination. His oratory is best remembered for the closing of Tom Robinson’s trial, where he (fruitlessly) asked the jury to ignore their prejudices and bring in a verdict based on the evidence that had clearly shown his client was innocent. Here is the closing portion of that inspirational speech:

“And so, a quiet, humble, respectable Negro, who has had the unmitigated temerity to feel sorry for a white woman, has had to put his word against two white peoples. The defendant is not guilty. But somebody in this courtroom is. Now gentlemen, in this country, our courts are the great levelers. In our courts, all men are created equal. I’m no idealist to believe firmly in the integrity of our courts and of our jury system. That’s no ideal to me. That is a living, working reality. Now I am confident that you gentlemen will review – without passion – the evidence that you have heard, come to a decision, and restore this man to his family. In the name of God, do your duty. In the name of God, believe Tom Robinson.”

 
 
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country. Men, all this stuff you’ve heard about America not wanting to fight – wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dung. Americans traditionally love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle. When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, big league ball players, the toughest boxers. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. I wouldn’t give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That’s why Americans have never lost and will never lose a war, because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans. Now, an army is a team – it lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team.”
TODAY’S MOVIE DIVA OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. KIM HILLYARD! 🙌🙌🙌🙇‍♀️👍
 
________________________________________________________ 
 
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
In these Word Pyramids, the first letter is given to you (which is the first answer). Use the clues to build the pyramid to find the answer. In each consecutive answer, a letter is added to the previous answer. However, the answer letters might not be in the same order. Good Luck!!

Starting letter: I
Clues:
1. 3.1415926535…
2. to cut, tear apart
3. a support for two adjacent bridge spans
4. first in excellence, quality, or value

5. —— State Building

Answer:
I

PI
RIP
PIER
PRIME
EMPIRE

The Empire State Building is once again New York City’s tallest skyscraper (it was for nearly 40 years prior to the World Trade Center). The building is a symbol of this city and was constructed in only two years – 1930 to 1931. It stands 1,453 feet tall and weighs approximately 365,000 tons.

 
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
After months of hard work, five scientists have eliminated the need for perfume by perfecting a procedure for creating scented jewelry! By altering the chemical composition of the metal, each scientist saturated a different piece of jewelry with a different scent. Upon completion of the items, the ingenious scientists brought them to the designers at Sentir Jewelers who set a different stone in each piece. From the information provided, determine the piece of jewelry each scientist had scented and the stone that was set within each piece.

Scientist: Dr. Phil, Dr. Ruth, Dr. Seuss, Dr. Spock, Dr. Zhivago
Piece of Jewelry: Bracelet, Brooch, Earrings, Necklace, Ring
Scent: Lavender, Musk, Patchouli, Rose, Sandalwood
Stone: Amethyst, Cat’s Eye, Garnet, Moonstone, Opal
1. Neither the opal necklace nor the piece set with a moonstone is the patchouli-scented item (which wasn’t created by Dr. Ruth).
2. Dr. Phil’s piece of jewelry is neither the lavender-scented one nor the rose-scented item.
3. The amethyst (which wasn’t placed in the ring altered by Dr. Zhivago) wasn’t set in the pair of earrings Dr. Seuss altered.
4. Dr. Spock is neither the scientist who worked on the brooch nor the one who fashioned the necklace.
5. Dr. Seuss scented his jewelry with musk. A garnet was set in Dr. Ruth’s piece.

6. The piece set with moonstone (which isn’t rose-scented) isn’t the pair of earrings.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

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