WELCOME to TUESDAY May 30, 2023
10 Step Guide to Being Handy Around the House
- If you can’t find a screwdriver, use a knife. If you break
off the tip, it’s an improved screwdriver. - Try to work alone. An audience is rarely any help.
- Despite what you may have been told by your mother, praying and cursing are both
helpful in home repair… but only if you are working alone. - Work in the kitchen whenever you can… many fine tools are there, its warm and
dry, and you are close to the refrigerator. - If it’s electronic, get a new one.
- Keep it simple: Get a new battery; replace the bulb or fuse; see if the tank is empty;
try turning it to the “on” switch; or just paint over it. - Always take credit for miracles. If you dropped the alarm clock while taking it apart
and it suddenly starts working, you have fixed it. - Regardless of what people say, kicking, pounding, and throwing sometimes DOES help.
- If something looks level, it is level.
- Above all, if what you’ve done is stupid, but it works, then it isn’t stupid.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY!, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“American Airlines is under fire after one of its flight attendants allegedly yanked
a stroller away from a mother with a baby. Passengers were outraged that
the attendant took the stroller and not the baby.” -Conan O’Brien
“A major food company has recalled two types of frozen hash browns because the
potatoes may contain pieces of golf balls. Doctors say if you’ve already ingested pieces
of golf balls, the best thing is to just let them play through.” -James Corden😁
“A New Jersey restaurant has begun selling a massive taco-covered pizza for $75. ‘Seems
a little steep,’ said a customer who was looking at the three steps
in front of the restaurant.” -Seth Meyers
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A man sees a job ad posted on a construction site, “Handy man wanted; apply within.”
So he does and speaks to the foreman.
“Can you drive a Bobcat?” the foreman asks.
“No.”
“Can you plaster?”
“No.”
“Have you ever done any carpentry?”
“No.”
“If you don’t mind me asking,” says the foreman, “what’s so handy about you?”
“Well, I only live about five minutes down the road…” 😳😳😳
Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“She was the Picasso of passive-aggressive karate.”
Answer: American Hustle!
Christian Bale plays Irving Rosenfeld, who describes his wife Rosalyn Rosenfeld in this manner. She is played by Jennifer Lawrence, in an amazingly convincing ditzy way, comical, but also frustrating. The film “American Hustle” is hard to categorize in a genre which is perhaps part of its excellence. Irving is a con-man and his wife, Rosalyn, is only too happy to reap the rewards of his duplicity, although not particularly adept at helping out. And that’s where Sydney Prosser, played by Amy Adams,
comes in–she is Irving’s mistress and proves a very capable con-woman.
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“To make honey, young bee need young flower, not old prune.”
Friday’s Quizzler is….
My veins extend beneath the earth,
My hands raised toward the sky,
I can seem to live forever,
Though many times I die.
I cry when I am wounded,
Sweet tears that help me heal,
I mourn and take off all my clothes,
When bitterness I feel.
What am I?
Answer: I am a Tree.
The first section refers to roots and the tree’s hibernation in winter.
The second section refers to tree sap and the shedding of leaves when it gets bitter cold.
Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
When you behead a word, you remove the first letter and still have a valid word. You will be given clues for the two words, longer word first.
Example: Begin -> Sour, acidic
Answer: The words are Start and Tart.
- Delayed -> Delighted
- Dresses -> Possesses
- Duplicate -> Solitary
- Contemplated -> Employed
- Useless -> Useful
- Falling behind -> Feature to prevent falling
- Holds waste water -> Holds drinking water
- Poke with a stick -> A pole or stick
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNEDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.
The World According to the Eucman! 