WELC0ME to TUESDAY MAY 14. 2024
Here’s The Story…..
A therapist has a theory that the more often couples make love, the
happier they are. So he tests it at a seminar by asking those assembled,
“How many people here make love 2 to 3 times a week?” Half the people
raise their hands, each of them grinning widely. “How about once a week?”
A third of the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less
vibrant. “Once a month?” A few hands tepidly go up. Then he asks,
“OK, how about once a year?” One man in the back jumps up and down,
jubilantly waving his hands. The therapist is shocked as this lone aberration
disproves his theory. “If you make love only once a year,” he asks,
“what are you so happy about?” The man yells, “Today’s the day!” 😳😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
The CEO of Wendy’s says the election is hurting the chain’s burger sales – people
are spending less because they are worried about the future. Let’s be honest, if
you’re eating a Wendy’s Baconator, you’re probably not too concerned about the future.” -Jimmy Fallon
“Mylan, the company that produces these EpiPens, have jacked up the price of these
pens for less than $100 for a pair, to over $600. That price is enough to send you into
shock, but don’t do it because you can’t afford the pen anymore.” -Stephen Colbert
“It was reported this week that scientists from the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence
or SETI have detected a signal from a distant star, and they think it could be proof of alien
life. Scientists say this could be the sign of a highly advanced alien civilization.
While the aliens say, ‘We attack at dawn.'” -James Corden
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
n the British documentary 56 Up, a man shared that he had earned a law degree
at Oxford. Then, in his thick English accent, he proudly proclaimed that he was now a “barrister.”
My 13-year-old daughter wasn’t impressed. “So,” she said, “he spent all that effort getting
an Oxford law degree, and now he works at Starbucks?” 😳😳
Monday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
This movie is about a family staying at a hotel for the winter in Colorado.
Danny, the son has psychic powers and tries to warn his father about the ghosts.
Answer: The Shining!
“The Shining” is based on the 1977 Stephen King book. The movie was filmed in Colorado. Jack Nicholson was Stanley Kubrick’s first choice to play Jack Torrance. Robin Williams and Harrison Ford didn’t meet Stephen King’s approval for the movie. Jack Nicholson thought Jessica Lange would be a better fit to play Wendy instead of Shelley Duvall. “The Shining” is about a family staying at a hotel for the winter in Colorado. Danny, the son has psychic powers and tries to warn his father about the ghosts. At the end of the movie Jack goes mad when the supernatural beings in the hotel invade his mind.
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
This movie is about an upscale country club with a scheming president.
Monday’s Quizzler is….
Jessica, Matt, Chris, Ellen, and Tony are five students having the surnames Saunders, Alvarez, Mason, Tan, and Locke (not necessarily in that order) assigned to each read a different book and write a book report on them. But their teacher, unluckily, has forgotten which student is supposed to read which book! Help her figure out the students’ full names, assigned books, and presentation dates from the clues below.
Students: Jessica, Matt, Chris, Ellen, Tony
Surnames: Saunders, Alvarez, Mason, Tan, Locke
Books: Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Gone With the Wind, War and Peace, Oliver Twist
Days: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday
- Jessica, Chris, and the girl reading War and Peace plan to write their reports together on Monday night.
- The 5 students are Matt, the girl presenting on Wednesday, the guy presenting on Tuesday, the kid reading Gone With the Wind, and Chris Saunders.
- No person has the same first and last initials.
- Miss Alvarez is presenting on Wednesday, while Pride and Prejudice is being presented on Monday.
- Locke is mad he is the first to present, but Chris is happy because he is last.
- Miss Tan wanted to read either Jane Eyre or War and Peace, but Tony and Ellen wound up reporting them instead.
ANSWER: Jessica Tan is reporting Gone With the Wind on Thursday.
Matt Locke is reporting Pride and Prejudice on Monday.
Chris Saunders is reporting Oliver Twist on Friday.
Ellen Alvarez is reporting War and Peace on Wednesday.
Tony Mason is reporting Jane Eyre on Tuesday.
Monday’s Quizzler is….😎😎
This is another of my rhyming word ladders. Most people will have
to work forwards and backwards to get all ten words.
The old adage says to do this again.
Add one, make a city of fame way back when.
OY becomes IP and you’ll have a nice fall.
Change I to A and you’ll catch it all.
Insert an M: make an invention of Chaplin.
Change T to C and with pain you’ll be grapplin’.
Replace second with H: a winner for sure!
Lose second to last: you’ll want balm for a cure.
Drop the H to make something to go on your head.
Change one and an adage will leave this thing dead.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. 😳😳
The World According to the Eucman! 