WELCOME to TUESDAY SEPTEMBER 24, 2024
Here’s the Story….
A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship
with your husband. The women were asked, “How many of you love your husband?”
All the women raised their hands.
Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?”
Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn’t remember.
The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband: “I love you, sweetheart.”
The women were then told to exchange phones with another person, and to read
aloud the text message they received, in response.
Here are some of the replies:
- Who the hell is this?
- Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
- Yeah, and I love you too. What’s up with you?
- What now? Did you wreck the car again?
- I don’t understand what you mean?
- What the hell did you do now?
- You’re kidding, right?
- Don’t beat about the bush; just tell me how much you need?
- Am I dreaming?
- If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
- I thought we agreed you wouldn’t drink during the day. (my favorite)
- Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn’t she?
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY!, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Yale University’s being pushed to modify a poetry course because students
have complained that the content is too white. Students objected specifically
to a poem called ‘Ode to a Lost Prius in the Whole Foods Parking Lot.'” -Conan O’Brien
“Authorities are warning people to avoid swimming in some New Jersey rivers
because of increased numbers of so-called clinging jellyfish. Though if you’re
swimming in New Jersey rivers, you’re probably not big on warnings.” -Seth Meyers
“This was a little controversial: Pope Francis recently said that the majority of
modern Catholic marriages are worthless because couples don’t always mean it
when they say they’ll love each other forever. And that’s the last time Pope
Francis was ever asked to give a best man speech.” -Jimmy Fallon
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A guy from Brooklyn was in Hong Kong. While passing through a Jewish
neighborhood he was surprised to see a synagogue. He went in and sure
enough, he saw a Chinese rabbi and a Chinese congregation. The service was touching.
As the service ended, the rabbi stood at the door greeting his congregants.
When our Brooklyn friend came up, the Chinese rabbi said….”You’re a Jew?”
“Yes, I’m Jewish,” replied the Brooklynite.
“Funny,” said the Chinese rabbi. “You don’t look it.” 😳😳
Monday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
This movie is a steampunk western action-comedy film.
Answer: Wild Wild West!
Jim West is the protagonist of the movie Wild Wild West. The movie is a steampunk western action-comedy film directed by Barry Sonnenfeld and stars Will Smith, Kevin Kline, and Kenneth Branagh. The movie is based on the 1960s television series of the same name and follows two Secret Service agents, Jim West and Artemus Gordon, as they try to stop a diabolical genius named Dr. Arliss Loveless from assassinating President Ulysses S. Grant. The movie was a commercial success, grossing over $222 million worldwide, but received negative reviews from critics. Despite the negative reviews, the movie has gained a cult following over the years.
Tuesday’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
This movie is about a character from a movie about a teenage girl with telekinetic powers who is bullied by her classmates.
Monday’s Quizzler is….
Each group of three definitions describes three words that
are spelled the same, except for one letter (each group describes
a different set of words). Example: king, ring, wing.
1a) a bone in the leg
1b) arboreal mammal, common to Madagascar
1c) to take exception or object
2a) a mixture of liquids, as for medicine
2b) a liquid preparation for cosmetic use
2c) an opinion or view
3a) something having a spiral or twisted form
3b) to hold back or restrain
3c) the thick part of coagulated milk
4a) to beat or damage with repeated blows
4b) to trade by exchange of goods
4c) good-natured witty joking
Answer: 1) femur, lemur, demur
2) potion, lotion, notion
3) curl, curb, curd
4) batter, barter, banter
Tuesday’s Quizzler is….😎😎
For each of the following four words, come up with another English word that uses all THE SAME letters but in a different order. The four words you come up with will rhyme with one another.
ONSET
NEWS
WRONG
HORNET
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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The World According to the Eucman! 