WELCOME to THURSDAY JANUARY 8th, 2026
Here’s The Story….
Four old, retired guys are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona . They turn a corner
and see a sign that says, “Old Timers Bar – ALL drinks 10 cents.” They look at each other,
and then go in, thinking, this is too good to be true.
The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room,
“Come on in and let me pour one for you! What’ll It be, gentlemen?”
There’s a fully stocked bar, so each of the men orders a Martini. In no time the bartender
serves up four iced Martinis – shaken, not stirred – and says, “That’ll be 10 Cents each, please.”
The four guys stare at the bartender for a moment, then at each other.
They can’t believe their good luck. They pay the
40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round.
Again, four excellent martinis are produced, with the Bartender again saying,
“That’s 40 cents, please.” They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity gets the better of them.
They’ve each had two martinis and haven’t even spent a dollar yet.
Finally one of them says, “How can you afford to serve Martinis as good as these for a dime apiece?”
“I’m a retired tailor from Phoenix ,” the bartender says, “and I always wanted to own a bar.
Last year I hit the Lottery jackpot for $125 million and decided to open this Place.
Every drink costs a dime. Wine, liquor, beer – it’s all the same”
“Wow! That’s some story!” one of the men says.
As the four of them sip at their martinis, they can’t help noticing seven other people at the
end of the bar who don’t have any drinks in front of them and
haven’t ordered anything the whole time they’ve been there.
Nodding at the seven at the end of the bar, one of the men asks the bartender, “What’s with them?”
The bartender says,
“They’re retirees from Australia.
They’re waiting for Happy Hour when drinks are half-price.” 😮😮
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT THURSDAY people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
q u o t e s o f t h e d a y
“Researchers are claiming that humans can only maintain close relationships with
five people. Which should make for an interesting Mother’s Day for my mom
and her six kids.” -Conan O’Brien
“Industry experts are speculating that Chipotle could be planning to add breakfast
options. Of course, Chipotle already has a breakfast option.
It’s the half a burrito you woke up next to.” -Seth Meyers
“The U.S. Surgeon General released a statement this week that said more Americans
should start going on walks. Then to everyone’s surprise, he added, ‘Even if you’re
just going out to have a smoke. Just stand up for once.'” -Jimmy Fallon
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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
A young man applied for a job at a new factory being built in a nearby town.
He entered the main office, where the receptionist directed him down the hall
to an office where he was to be interviewed by the Personnel Officer.
After several minutes of describing and explaining all about the new factory,
the Personnel Officer told the young man, “We need individuals who are totally responsible.”
The young man grinned and responded: “Well, I sure qualify. Everywhere I’ve
worked, when something went wrong, I was always responsible!”
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!
On October 6th 1927, which film contained the first spoken lines “Wait a minute, wait a minute! You ain’t heard nothing yet!”?
Answer: “The Jazz Singer” launched the “talkie” genre which quickly replaced silent films. Produced by Warner Bros. the film starred Al Jolson who was paid $75,000 for his role. Jolson starred in several Warner Bros. films including “The Singing Fool” containing the song “Sonny Boy” which was the first American record to sell one million copies.
Thursdays Movie Trivia of the day!
Which famous actor played the main character in the 1999 film “Sleepy Hollow”?
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
Inside we’re wet and outside we’re dry
But the weather we do not defy
Losing our heads, we don’t go berserk
But this is when we do our best work
Some of us activate with a click
Although human power makes us tick
We’re instruments not found in a band
We’re useless unless given a hand
What are we?
Answer: pens
lines 1-2: Pens are wet on the inside because of the ink they contain. They are dry on the outside.
lines 3-4: Some pens have caps (“heads”) that need to be removed before one can write with them.
lines 5-6: Other pens work by pressing their button, which often produces the sound of a “click”. This “click” is not to be confused with the click of a computer mouse. Pens work via “human power” whereas computers need electric power in order to function.
lines 7-8: Pens are writing “instruments”, not musical instruments. Without the aid of one’s “hand”, pens are “useless”.
Thursday’s Quizzler is….😎😎
In this teaser, you are given odd definitions of terms. The terms must be found, and they sound approximately like the names of U.S. states. Can you get all five?
- What a certain spectator sport’s spectators do
- Doing 2,000 pounds of laundry
- What to buy if you’re only slightly thirsty
- Mindful of a wooded valley
- Bauxite that is missing
The hint gives the first letter of each state name.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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The World According to the Eucman! 