WELCOME to Wednesday, December 8, 2010. “You know it’s Your Last Day At Work When”……..

You hand a bank teller an envelope, and when she asks, “What’s this?”, you realize you just dropped the company’s deposit in a mailbox.

A woman comes into the store, you turn to the other salesman and say, “I waited on the last fat ugly old lady. This one’s your turn”. Your boss is standing behind you. It’s his wife.

While your boss is at lunch, you sneak in and look at some confidential information on his computer. You spill coffee on the keyboard. It shorts out.

You return from a week’s vacation to find that you had scheduled *this* week as vacation, not last week.

You take a “sick” day. The next morning the boss asks you, “So, how was the fishing on Rock Creek yesterday?”.

You wake up hung over. You have a black eye and barked knuckles. You’re in jail. Last night was the company Christmas party.

Hey I’m just saying! Have a wonderful Wednesday and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here!

q u o t e s . o f . t h e . d a y

“The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible.”
– David M. Ogilvy

“I have learned that to be with those I like is enough.”
– Walt Whitman

“Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.”
– Sir Richard Steele

“It was this time in 1933 that prohibition was repealed.
Prohibition was such a good idea. Making something illegal always stops people from using it.” -Craig Ferguson

“You have to be careful of political correctness this time
of the year. You can’t call them ‘Santa’s elves’ anymore.
They’e ‘undocumented little people.'” -Jay Leno

“The biggest winner on Black Friday was Costco. So kids can look forward to running downstairs on Christmas morning to find a 12-gallon barrel of olives.” -Conan O’Brien

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes.

Every morning, I do a mad dash to drop off my son Tyler at day care so I can get to work on time. My impatience hit home one morning when he piped up from the back of the car,
“Our car is really fast and everyone else’s is slow because they’re all idiots, right, Mom?”
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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? ‘I work at the Pentagon, Sergeant, so I admit I’m a little slow on the uptake; otherwise, I’d say that you just threatened me. Did you just threaten me, soldier? Because if you did, let me respond to you this way: I’m an officer, and therefore by proclamation a gentleman…but don’t abuse that, son. Don’t get in my crosshairs. Because I’ll have no compunctions whatsoever about gettin’ up to my neck in your butt. You understand me?’

Answer: Courage Under Fire! Lt. Col. Nat Serling (Denzel Washington) reminds the cocky Sgt. Monfriez (Lou Diamond Phillips) just who’s in charge.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? ‘Awww, look — you gave that tall man some flowers.’
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Tuesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007, try and identify which song or which artist.” “You know every guy in here tonight would like to take you home but I’ve got way more class than them babe that ain’t what I want”

ANSWER: “Ticks” – Brad Paisley Brad Paisley is from West Virginia.

Wednesday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2007 try and identify which song or which artist.”

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Tuesday’s Quizzler is..

Below are five titles of novels. However, they have been rephrased, and it is your job to figure them out.

1. Blanched canine tooth

2. The vindictive woody vines of the genus Vitis

3. Blessed and evil spirits

4. The Foreigners

5. Journals of a Japanese entertainer

ANSWER: 1. White Fang, 2. The Grapes of Wrath, 3. Angels and Demons
4. The Outsiders, 5. Memoirs of a Geisha

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…  

Look out below!! It is another common phrase in rebus form, can you guess it?

London: Shakespeare (Writer)
London: Weigh

New York: Smith (Actor)
New York: Whey

Paris : McEnroe (Sports)
Paris: “No Way!”

TODAYS QUIZZMASTERS OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO SWEETJAZZ5, MS. ANDREA L. BANKS, AND MS. CARRIE PALOMBO FOR SOLVING TUESDAY’S QUIZZLER OF THE DAY! GREAT JOB LADIES!
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Answers in THURSDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/