WELCOME to Monday, November 28, 2011. Things proven to change the course of Thanksgiving………. 

1. During the middle of the meal, turn to mom and say, “See mom, I told you they wouldn’t notice that the turkey was four months past its expiration date. You were worried for nothing.”
2. When everyone goes around to say what they are thankful for, say, “I’m thankful I didn’t get caught” and refuse to say anything more.
3. Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen, toss it all in the blender, and take your “shake” back to the table. Announce that it’s the new Thanksgiving Weight Loss Shake
4. Prepare a several hour long speech to give when asked about your thankfulness. If necessary, insist that no one leave or eat until you have finished the speech.
5. Bring along old recorded football games and pop them in the VCR when dad’s not looking. Make sure it is set to the last two minutes of the game when he comes into the room, turn off the VCR, and then turn on the regular TV.
6. Bring a date that only talks about the tragic and abusive conditions known to exist at turkey farms. Request that she bring photos

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

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QUOTES OF THE DAY….

“I had general anesthesia for my surgery. It’s so weird. You go to sleep in one room and then wake up four hours later in a totally different room. Just like in college.” –Ross Shafer

“I used to be With IT. But then they changed what IT was. Now what I’m with isn’t IT, and what’s IT seems scary and wierd. It’ll happen to YOU.” –Abe Simpson, The Simpsons “I don’t have a lot of experience with vampires, but I have hunted werewolves. I shot one once, but by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor’s dog.” -Dwight Schrute, The Office

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G U A R A N T E D  T O  M A K E  Y O U  L A F F….

One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister’s house for the traditional feast.  Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store.  When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen,and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey.  She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven. When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing.  When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird.  With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, “Patricia, you’ve cooked a pregnant bird!” At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs.

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Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from??? “Arugula, I haven’t had Arugula in six weeks.”   Answer: My Blue Heaven. As Steve Martin exits the supermarket he is asked by the store manager if there was anything that he wanted that the store didn’t have. The manager asks him what arugula is, to which he replies, “It’s a vegetable.” Luckily they didn’t ask him about the hundreds of pounds of beef he just bought for less than $20.

Mondays Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from?? “You wanna fight, then you fight me you ugly, smelly-breath suka.” “Or how ’bout you? String bean, Rick James-lookin’ fool?”

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Friday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2009/2010, try and identify which song or which artist. “When I grow up I wanna see the world, Drive nice cars, I wanna have groupies! Answer: groupies. These lyrics are from the song “When I Grow Up” by The Pussycat Dolls. This song topped #6 on the iTunes’ “Top Songs” list in June 2008. After only 22 days of being available, “When I Grow Up” reached #2 on the Top 100 pop songs chart in the U.S.

Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2009/2010, try and identify which song or which artist.“Faded pictures on the wall, It’s like they talkin’ to me. Disconnectin’ your call.”
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Friday’s Quizzler is…..