WELCOME to Wednesday, December 13, 2017.
The Funniest Names in English…
Ahn Wee-A bored Chinese woman living in France.
Alan Rench-A guy who is handy with tools.
Alga Rithem-Chair of the math department.
Alison Wonderland-A rather flaky lady.
Ally Katz-An aggressive woman; a real fighter.
Ally Louia-A woman who just won the lottery.
Ally Monie-A gay divorcee (in the original sense).
Amanda Lynn-A lady musician: guess what she plays.
Anita Ficks-A Hollywood actress who hasn’t made a film for 5 years.
Anita Job-A woman recently fired for botching one job too many.
Ann Thrax-A bioterrorist of the worst sort.
Anna Botik-Doctor Anna Botik, if you don’t mind.
Anna Conda-A seductive, untrustworthy woman.
Anna Nimmity-A woman of mystery.
Anna Phalaxis-A woman given to fainting spells.
Anne Chovee-A cold fish of a woman who uses salty language.
April Day-A bright woman given to gloomy days.
April Showers-A woman who loves cloudy, rainy days.
April Weeks-A woman who breezes in and out.
Argyle Greenpasture-A farmer or farmer’s wife. I can’t remember.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Wednesday people and
whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
“New York woman is suing her surgeon claiming he was on his cell phone during
her operation. In response, the doctor said, ‘For your information,
I was Googling how to perform surgery.'” -Conan O’Brien
“A new study found that running for two minutes is just as good for you as
working out for 90 minutes. That doesn’t sound like a study it sounds like
something a chubby guy says after being on the treadmill for two minutes.” -Jimmy Fallon
“There’s a holiday gift giving trend that’s supposedly on the rise this year called
self-gifting, meaning it’s OK to buy a gift for yourself. But buying a gift and wrapping
it for yourself, that’s just pathetic.” -Jimmy Kimmel
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
My brother Scott brought over a photo album of his camping trip. One picture showed a
brown bear helping itself to his food. “What kind of bear is that?” I asked.
“It’s called a Kodiak,” Scott replied.
“Oh, yeah?” my husband Keith shot back. “And I suppose those white
ones in the Arctic are called Polaroids.” 😐
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
Mathilda: ‘Leon, I think I’m falling in love with you. It’s the first time for me, you know?’
Leon: ‘How do you know it’s love if you’ve never been in love before?’
Mathilda: ‘Cause I feel it.’
Mathilda: ‘In my stomach. It’s all warm. I always had a knot there and now, . . . it’s gone.’
Leon: ‘Mathilda, I’m glad you don’t have a stomach ache any more. I don’t think it means anything.’
ANSWER: Leon! Mathilda (Natalie Portman) divulges her growing affection to Leon (Jean Reno) and he dismisses them. Many audiences found the love story in this film to be distasteful, and apparently some scenes important to it were cut from American versions (and yes, the American version is entitled ‘The Professional’).
Wednesdays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??
‘She’ll only break your heart, it’s a fact. And even though I warn you, even though I guarantee you that the girl will only hurt you terribly, you’ll still pursue her. Ain’t love grand?’
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
Welcome! My desk can be called the NICETIES PORT,
I know who comes and goes; I have ENTIRE OPTICS.
I often serve another role, not as a TIE INSPECTOR,
But as one who writes memos and NOTICES TRIPE.
My notes are complete, not just TOPIC ENTRIES,
I’m often asked for details and to RECITE POINTS.
Photocopier problems? I can help with TINT, RECOPIES,
I track expenses, I am who you bring RECEIPTS IN TO.
Who am I?
ANSWER: Receptionist. The receptionist sometimes only receives visitors
and answers the telephone, but in many offices also performs many secretarial functions.
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
When you behead a word, you remove the first letter and still have a valid word. You will be given clues for the two words, longer word first.
Example: Begin -> Sour, acidic
Answer: The words are Start and Tart.
1. Pass by -> Temporary failure
2. Picture -> Wizard
3. Brave -> Fortunate
4. Enthusiastic meetings -> Partners
5. Attacked -> Helped
6. Choose -> Choose
7. Fragments -> Dice game
8. Customary practice -> Spiritual mentor
Bonus: Take the eight beheaded letters and form a one-word anagram; you will find something amazing.
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/