WELCOME to Thursday, December 21, 2017.
Funny file extensions linked to occupations:
.api = Comedian
.asp = Snake-in-the-grass
.bin = Refuse collector
.doc = Fixer
.chk = Chess champion
.dic = Private eye
.exe = Hang man
.fav = Boot licker
.gem = Jeweller
.ico = Office pin-up
.inf = Filing Clerk
.ins = Insurance agent
.mad = Psychiatrist
.mam = Midwife
.mapi = Planning officer
.mov = Removal company
.mpg = Car salesman
.png = Table Tennis Champion
.ppt = Punch and Judy operator
.pub = Alcoholic
.qt = Strong silent type
.rat = Spy
.snd = Disk Jockey
.sys = Sisterfunny file names
.tiff = Marriage guidance counsellor
.wav = Cheerleader
.wiz = Magician
.wri = Secretary
.zap = Company hatchet man
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Thursday people
and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
“I failed my driver’s test. The guy asked me, “What do you do at a red light?”
I said, “I don’t know, look around, listen to the radio” –Bill Braudis
“I filled out a rental application that asked, ‘Do you own any liquid-filled furniture?’ Couldn’t they just have said ‘waterbed’? How many other forms of liquid-filled furniture are there? ‘Yeah, I have a beer couch, will that be a problem?'” –Lisa Goich
“The weirder you’re going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person.” –P. J. O’Rourke
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
A family had moved to Seattle from Texas, and each of them missed their old home.
That December, when they went to pick up their first-grade son from school, his teacher
told them about a conversation she overheard.
One boy said, “We’re Catholic, and we are going to Christmas Mass.”
“Were Jewish,” said another child. “And we’re going to have a Hanukkah celebration.
“Madison chimed in, “We’re Texans, and were going to have a barbecue.”😐
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
‘The American people want somebody to articulate their rage for them.’
ANSWER: Network! Faye Dunaway’s character says this as she berates her aides for not
reading the concept analysis report she sent out. Her programming idea is to
articulate that rage and appeal to a mass audience.
Thursdays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??
‘He’s a fountain of misplaced rage. Name your cliche; mother held him too much or not enough, last picked at kickball, late night sneaky uncle, whatever. Now he’s so angry that moments of levity actually cause him pain; give him headaches. Happiness, for that gentleman, hurts.’
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
Find 17 creatures in this paragraph.
Kneel in the kayak grasping the boat, but don’t wrench the bullion or scowl at the chart. Behind the taped and sealed planter is a benevolent collier. The foxglove is in the bath.
ANSWER: Eel, yak, asp, boa, wren, bull, cow, ape, seal, ant, vole, collie, fox, bat, ox, lion,
owl (plus char, hart and hind for three bonus points, but these are more difficult. Char is a fish, related to trout and/or salmon and the hart is a kind of deer, while the hind is either a fish or a deer, depending on your usage.)
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
In each group below, the three words end in the same three letters, so they look like they should
rhyme, but they don’t. See if you can figure out the missing letters in each group.
Example: plo___, tho___, to___ would be plough, though, tough.
1. b___, el___, oppos___
2. bl___, br___, g___
3. f___, h___, t___
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/