WELCOME to Tuesday May 29, 2018.
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t want.
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about thefuture until he gets a wife. 😱
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful womanis one who can find such a man.
To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot & love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all. 😐
Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die. 😁😱😎
Any married man should forget his mistakes-there’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t. A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change & she does.
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
There are 2 times when a man doesn’t understand a woman: before marriage & after.
“Some royal wedding guests are already selling their gift bags on eBay. In fact, today
“Hasbro has filed to trademark the scent of Play-Doh. Hasbro describes the scent as a ‘sweet, slightly musky vanilla fragrance with slight overtones of cherry, combined with the smell of a salted wheat-based dough.’ While kids are describing it as ‘delicious.'” -Seth Meyers
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
The zoo officials raised the height of the fence to ten feet. Again, however, the next morning the kangaroo was again roaming about the zoo. This kept on, night after night, until the fence was 20 feet high.
Finally, the camel in the next enclosure asked the kangaroo, “How high do you think they’ll go?”
The kangaroo replied, “Who knows? Maybe 50 feet. Unless somebody starts locking the gate at night.” 😁😎
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
ANSWER: Up In Smoke!
They use me to make hands, but I’m not a finger.
I’m international, and cosmopolitan. I’m very often in Monte Carlo, Las Vegas, Atlantic City and even in Punta del Este.
I’m not alive but I have 81 hearts.
What am I?
Answer:
Because there are 52 cards plus two jokers in a deck, the total is 54.
If you count all the hearts drawn in the 13 cards of hearts, you’ll find 81.
Maybe your car does 0 to 60 in 10 sec., but can you do this “0 to 10” in 60 sec.? Go on – get out the stopwatch!
The hint provides the starting letters of the even numbered words.
1. Ford model, known as “Tin Lizzie”
2. @
3. Traitor (slang)
4. Not before the horse, please!
5. Track down; discover
6. Collected by bees
7. Convinced, beyond any doubt
8. Completed in 6 days, according to Genesis
9. “Ashes to ashes”
10. Power and authority; significance
The World According to the Eucman! 