Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Here’s the story…..  A man goes to consult a specialist about his medical problem. After the visit the man asks, “How much do I owe you?” “My fee is five hundred dollars,” replies the physician. “Five hundred dollars? That’s impossible. No one charges that much!” “In your case,” the doctor replies, “I suppose I could adjust my fee to three hundred.” “Three hundred dollars? For one visit? Ridiculous.” “Well, then, could you afford two hundred?” “Who has that kind of money?” “Look, replies the doctor,” growing irritated, “Just give me a hundred and get out of my office, okay?” “I can give you fifty,” says the man. “Take it or leave it.” “I don’t understand you,” says the doctor. “Why did you come to the most expensive doctor in New York if you have no money?” “Listen, Doctor,” says the patient, “When it comes to my health, nothing is too expensive!” 😳😁😎 
Hey I’m just saying. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY
TUESDAY people, stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up!Peace, I am outta here!  Eucman!  

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y  

“North Korea has shut down all of its universities for 10 months so students can work in factories. Or, as they call it in North Korea, ‘spring break.'” -Conan O’Brien

“We’re celebrating our independence from the British. I hope that in a couple years, we’ll be able to celebrate our independence from the Chinese.” -David Letterman

“They’ve found a link between chemicals in shampoo and obesity If you’re eating shampoo, your weight is the least of your concerns.” -Craig Ferguson

“I’m not a real movie star. I’ve still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.” – Will Rogers

“Age to me means nothing. I can’t get old; I’m working. I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. As long as you’re working, you stay young. When I’m in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age.”  George Burns    

G u a r a n t e e d   t o   R o l l  Y o u r   E y e s! Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. “Boss,” he says, “we’re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.” We’re short-handed, Smith” the boss replies. “I can’t give you the day off.”  “Thanks, boss,” says Smith “I knew I could count on you!” 😁😎   

Mondays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”     “Poetry doesn’t belong to those who write it; it belongs to those who need it.” Mario Ruoppolo, a humble, inarticulate and sensitive man, discovers his own longing for poetry through his encounter with famous Chilean poet Pablo Neruda, in exile on a remote Italian island. Gradually this new world of imagery and metaphors becomes, for him, a vital vehicle for recognizing and expressing his emotions, opening his eyes to the world around him, hearing the voices of nature, developing a political conscience, and, above all, winning the heart of his beloved.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???? “Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”

Monday’s Quizzler is….​  This teaser is based on ‘funny’ alternative definitions a word could have if you broke the word up into its syllables and treated the syllables as words in themselves. I will provide a list of words and a list of definitions, it is your job to match them up.
They are meant to be a bit light hearted and may not have perfectpronunciation so work the words in your head a bit. Having the definitions should provide help in this regard. Also note that sometimes the ‘newword’ syllables may not only be using one syllable in the word.
An example would be:Word: Contemplate “Con template”: A stencil that criminals are made from.
Definitions:Cake component made of Tolkien treefolkWorkers who put together kitchencabinetsThe term given to the profits made by a pubBrought litigation against a government officialWhat you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower

Answer:  Parasites – Paris’sites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel TowerSudafed – sued-a-fed: Brought litigation against a government officialEnticing – Ent-icing: Cake component made of Tolkien treefolkBargain – Bar-gain: The term given to the profits made by a pubCounterfeiters – counter-fitters: Workers who put together kitchencabinets  

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
You are an expert on paranormal activity and have been hired to locate a spirit haunting an old resort hotel. Strong signs indicate that the spirit lies behind one of four doors. The inscriptions on each door read as follows:
Door A: It’s behind B or CDoor B: It’s behind A or DDoor C: It’s in hereDoor D: It’s not in here
Your psychic powers have told you three of the inscriptions are false, and one is true. Behind which door will you find the spirit?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com.CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.



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