Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to TUESDAY May 18, 2021

Different Types of Punography…

Music can be a bit punny too! But it’s definitely an orchestrated effort.
You’re in treble now!
To fix it, you just need a tuba glue.
I like the natural look. Thanks, you’re pretty sharp yourself.
Life would B flat without music.
I’m here for you! Uke can do it!
I knew you were treble!
Quiet down in the Bach!
Why did the balloons run away from the concert? They were playing pop music!

Medicine is not a joking matter. It could even lead to a cardiac arrest. Enjoy a
few other medical puns that you might find humerus.
What did the artery say to the muscle? “You’re being a little vein.”
What did the phlebotomist say to cheer up the patient? “B positive.”
What did the leg say to the foot? “It’s going tibia k!”
What did the heart say to the lungs? “You take my breath away.”
Urine trouble!
I need antibiotics. Your smile is infectious
Why can’t you lie to the x-ray tech? They can see right through you.

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY! people, stay safe, and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Today was Star Wars Day, because the day was May Fourth, as in ‘May the fourth
be with you.” And now, it’s technically May Fifth, Cinco de Mayo, as in ‘May the fifth
margarita be in you.'” -James Corden

“Scientists have developed a new kind of robot that is able to shoot a gun. In fact,
earlier today, I was carjacked by my Roomba.” -Conan O’Brien

“A couple in Michigan is being sued for $2 million after they burned down their
apartment complex while trying to cook a squirrel with a blowtorch. I’m not an
accountant, but it SOUNDS like they might not have $2 million.” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
My wife asked me to buy ORGANIC vegetables from the market. I went and looked
around and couldn’t find any. So I grabbed a harassed and tired looking employee
and said, “These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?”
The produce guy looked at me and said, “No, sir, you’ll have to do that yourself.” 😳

Mondays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Stop! L.A.P.D! Get out of the car!”
“Hey man, this is MY car. I OWN this car. It’s NOT stolen.”

Answer: Speed!
In the events leading up to this scene, disgruntled explosives expert Howard Payne (Dennis Hopper) attempts to collect the disability settlement he thinks he is due by booby trapping a high-rise elevator and demanding a ransom. However, the L.A.P.D. SWAT team, which includes Officer Jack Traven (Keanu Reeves) and Detective Harry Temple (Jeff Daniels), is able to save all the passengers and prevent Payne’s plan. He then sabotages a city bus so that it will explode if its speed drops below 50 mph, or if any passengers are removed. In this scene Traven is attempting to commandeer a car so he can speed after the bus and warn it. He shows his badge and shouts line one to cars on the freeway. The black driver of a Jaguar convertible, who initially thinks he is being stopped on suspicion of car robbery, shouts back line two. Traven then pulls out his gun and says, “It is now. Move over.” In the 1995 Academy Awards “Speed” won two Oscars and was nominated for a third. Thirteen buses were used in filming the bus scenes, including one with special hydraulic suspension to allow cornering at high speeds, one with a camera platform on the front to allow filming the driver’s face, and two that were blown up. The highway scenes were filmed on a California freeway that had just been completed but had not yet been opened to the public.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from????
“Don’t ever do nothin’ like this again. Don’t come back up here.”
“You don’t have to worry about that, Sheriff.”

Monday’s Quizzler is….​
In this teaser, I have given you a 9-letter word. Your job is to break up this word into 9 separate letters and place them on the dashes to spell a 7-letter word, a 5-letter word, and a 3-letter word. You can use each letter only once.

CULTIVATE

  1. _ A _ I _ N _
  2. _ O _ N _
  3. _ C _

Answer: 1. VALIANT

  1. COUNT
  2. ICE

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
Once, there was a lovesick tiger who fell in love with a lovely lioness. However, her pride rejected him, and they were not allowed to be together because he was different.

Heart sickness and grief caused the lovely lioness to lose all of her fur. Even though it was a sad sight, the tiger was overjoyed! Now he would shave off all of his fur. Then he could pretend to be a large lion and be with his beloved.

Unfortunately, they did not get to live happily ever after! His plan failed. Even with his fur gone, everyone could tell he was a tiger.

Ignoring any obvious size differences, how did the pride know that he was obviously still a tiger?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.,

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