Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to TUESDAY JANUARY 11, 2021

Southern Phrases That Need A Dictionary Definition. PART II

“Yankee”
If you aren’t from the south, then there’s a chance someone from there might throw this term at you. You don’t have to enjoy baseball or even be a fan of the Yankee’s to earn this title. If someone calls you a Yankee, it merely means they assume you’re from the north, or you act like it. Yankee became popular in the south during the Civil War as a means to refer to Union soldiers.
“Over Yonder”
What’s that over there? Over where? Over yonder! If you’re visiting in the south and ask for directions, someone might use the phrase “over yonder.” The word yonder might be a phrase you aren’t used to, but used in the correct context and it isn’t tough to decipher. Bottom line, it translates to over there. A friendly point might be attached to the phrase to aid in which direction “yonder” is, so don’t be too baffled if you hear this.
“Barking Up The Wrong Tree”
You’ve probably heard this phrase before but didn’t know it originates from the south. People put themselves in situations that have them barking up the wrong tree all the time. Most of the time, you don’t even recognize it until someone else tells you. Generally, you’re barking up the wrong tree when you speak on a matter you’re not too versed in or if you assume the wrong thing. “If you think I’m going to give you $100, then you’re barking up the wrong tree.”
“Cattywampus”
When you first read this word and hear it, you might be thinking it’s ridiculous. The more you say it, however, you’ll want to indulge it even more because it sounds so fun. Cattywampus has nothing to do with cats. It means that something is sideways or out of sorts. If you have a painting in your living room and it tilts a little to the right, a southerner will say that it’s quite cattywampus and that you should straighten it.
“Sweating More Than A Sinner In Church”
Sometimes, the sun can be rude to the inhabitants of Earth. We didn’t ask for it to feel like we’re slowly descending into the pit of an active volcano. Maybe the air conditioner just broke, and it’s the hottest day of the summer, and you’re stuck inside. In any of those scenarios, you will be sweating more than a sinner in church. That’s a southern phrase that implies those who do no good feel the heat when they go to church.
“Till The Cows Come Home”
You might not own a farm, but the phrase till the cows come home can still apply to you. If someone you know who usually takes a long time tells you he or she will be right back, deep down, you know that’s not the case. You’ll be waiting till the cows come home for that person. The southern phrase implies that your wait time won’t be short and that you should be prepared to do something else in the meantime.
“No Bigger Than A Minnow In A Fishing Pond”
Southerners like using their metaphors and euphemisms! This phrase is pretty straight forward but might cause some confusion. If you’re telling a story and you need to describe something small, what would you say? If you’re from the south, then you’re going to say it was no bigger than a minnow in a fishing pond. The goal when fishing is to get something of decent size, but
sometimes you reel in some of those minnows that pale in comparison to the bass.
“Three Sheets To The Wind”
If you’ve gotten drunk before, then more than likely this phrase could have been applied to you. When you’ve had one too many drinks, but you swear to your friends that you’ll be fine, they might not agree. Ten minutes later and you’re standing on the bar asking for the bartender’s number. You’ve for sure had too much alcohol and the phrase three sheets to the wind certainly applies. This phrase has nautical roots but is used commonly in the south today. A “sheet” is a rope that’s unmoored and is flailing about wildly in the wind, just like a drunk person.
“Madder Than A Wet Hen”
We’ve never encountered a wet hen, but this slang term has nothing to do with them. If you hear that a woman is “madder than a wet hen,” you shouldn’t press any of her buttons. There’s no telling what she’s capable of doing when enraged. Remember, “hell has no fury like a woman scorned.” If you can remember that, then you will be comfortable remembering what the southern phrase madder than a wet hen means.
“Fixin’ To”
Has anyone ever told you to do something that you already planned on doing? It happens all the time, and southerners have a neat phrase to use a response. It’s simple and only two words: fixin’ to. “Hey, what are you about to do?” “Well, I’m fixin’ to do the dishes then go for a six-mile run.” See, there’s nothing to it. Unless you’re really fixin’ to “fix” something, this usually just means you’re about to do something.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a HAPPY TUESDAY people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“Thanks to Congress, meat producers no longer have to tell consumers where their meat comes
from. Upon hearing this, Arby’s said, ‘Waaay ahead of you, man.'” -Conan O’Brien

“China just installed new public bathrooms in Beijing that actually offer Wi-Fi. Yeah, a Wi-Fi-enabled
bathroom. Or as we call that here in America, Starbucks.'” -Jimmy Fallon

“There’s a new study that says giving your child too much praise can harm them later. If you’re too hard on your kids, they grow up with no self-confidence, but if you praise them too much, they grow up to be narcissists. What do these little monsters want from us?” -Jimmy Kimmel

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
The local high school has a policy that the parents must call the school if a student is to be absent for
the day. Alice deciding to skip school and go to the mall with her friends. So she waited until her parents had left for work and called the school herself.
“Hi, I’m calling to report that Alice is unable to make it to school today because she is ill.”
Secretary at high school answered, “I’m sorry to hear that. I’ll note her absence. Who is this calling please?” “This is my mother.” 😳

Mondays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“What is this demilitarized zone? Whatever it is, I like it! Gets you on your toes better than a strong cup of cappuccino.”

Answer: Good Morning Vietnam!
“Good Morning, Vietnam” was based on the real story of disc jockey Adrian Cronauer who worked in Saigon during the Vietnam War. This coffee quote is an accurate reflection of this man and his often-impudent attitude to authority. This coffee comment was just part of one of his many radio tirades protesting an unwinnable war. He was speaking to his on-air audience. Many consider Robin Williams portrayal of Cronauer to be one of his finest works.

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Thank-you for your coffee, signor. I shall miss that when we leave Casablanca.”

Monday’s Quizzler is….
I am three words,
Two of them appear the same,
Two are pronounced the same.
One is the third person use of “capable” or “permit”.
One means to sleep, but only for a bit.
The last word means a group of deer,
Perhaps now you can tell me, what words are here?

Answer: First word: Does
Second word: Doze
Third word: Does

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….
In this teaser, you are to start with the word ‘HALF’, and then each time, change a letter to
make a new word. You need to continue this process until you reach the word ‘BACK’.

You must do this in four (4) turns.

Good luck.

HALF

BACK

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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