Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to MONDAY JANUARY 10, 2021

Southern Phrases That Need A Dictionary Definition. PART I

“Aren’t You Precious”
One characteristic that’s especially prominent in the south is hospitality. Southerners love being polite and will disguise insults as compliments. Keep this in mind for whenever you hear “aren’t you precious,” because it could be loaded with sarcasm.
“Reckon”
We reckon it’s time to teach you about this word. If you’re having a conversation with someone
and you give your thoughts and opinions, then chances are that other person will chime in. That’s when they kick off their spiel with “I reckon.” In most cases, this southern word substitutes in place of I believe, imagine, suppose, and think.
“See To Christmas”
You’d have to some type of supervision to be able to see to Christmas. Luckily, that’s not what this phrase means. If you’re a woman and you go to a family event wearing a skirt that might be a little short, then chances are you might hear this slang. You think your outfit is perfectly fine until your grandmother sees it. That’s when she flares her nostrils, slightly offended at the length of your skirt, and says she can “see to Christmas!” All it means is that your garment might be a little too revealing.
“Being Ugly”
Don’t worry, you’re not unattractive. Southerners just have a way with words and will tell you that you’re being ugly if you’re acting unacceptably. Similar to when you get hungry, and you start to have an attitude with people, that’s when you’re being ugly. If you want to adopt this phrase, be careful who you use it with and around whom. Folks might start to think you’re calling people rough, when all you want them to do is switch up their attitude.
“Pretty As A Peach”
Sometimes a woman might look dashing to the eye, and you wish to compliment her. Sure, a simple “you look nice” or “how beautiful” can suffice, but in the south, there’s a different phrase. Southerners will tell her she looks pretty as a peach. It’s not to be taken in the literal sense, it’s just a short and sweet way of saying a girl how nice she looks. Ladies, next time you frequent the south, don’t be alarmed.
“Hissy Fit”
This phrase might be more on the universal side, but you hear it more in the south. If you’ve ever seen a young kid throw a temper tantrum after they’ve been denied that piece of candy, then you know how wild he or she can get. That would be a prime example of a hissy fit. It’s a handy phrase, and as we said, it’s spread beyond the diction of southerners. Folks on the west, east and everywhere in between use it as well.
“Too Big For Your Britches”
Southerners typically call their undergarments and pants britches. If you hear the phrase, you’re too big for your britches, that doesn’t mean you’re overweight at all (unless the person is disrespectful). Instead, it means someone might be getting ahead of themselves. Being too big for your britches indicates that you think too highly of yourself. For example, challenging
what your parents say when you’re young will make you too big for your britches, and you might be disciplined.
“Full As A Tick”
We all know that feeling of getting too full after eating a delicious meal. You feel it even more if it’s a home cooked meal, because who cooks better than your parents? Your belly is on the verge of blowing up, so what do you say? You utter the words “I’m full as a tick.” If you don’t live in Tick County, after they enjoy a healthy dose of blood, they can quickly balloon up.
It might not be the most inviting thing to visualize, but it’s accurate.
“Hold Your Horses”
Hold your horses! That doesn’t mean to go to your barn and grab hold of your precious animal. This is another common phrase that might not throw you off guard, and it simple to grasp. If you ever hear this slang, someone is trying to tell you to simmer down and wait. Sometimes, people can get anxious and become impatient, simply ask them to hold their horses and
hopefully, they’ll listen to your kind request.
“If The Creek Don’t Rise”
Having a busy life can put a damper on your social plans. People might invite you places, and no matter how badly you want to go, you can’t guarantee your appearance. Southerners have the perfect phrase for this situation. Take these older gentlemen you see in the picture. Say they meet every Tuesday at the same time, but one of them wishes to do something else on the upcoming Thursday. The other might have plans that night with his nephew, but it isn’t in stone yet. That’s when he’ll say, “Well, Jim, if the creek don’t rise, I’ll be there.” It’s just slang for we’ll see what I can do, but no guarantees.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A 94-year-old man from Indiana just became the oldest person to get a six degree black belt
in taekwondo. While nobody has the heart to tell him the wooden board he chopped
through was just a graham cracker.” -Jimmy Fallon

“It was reported this week that scientists from the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence or SETI
have detected a signal from a distant star, and they think it could be proof of alien life. Scientists
say this could be the sign of a highly advanced alien civilization. While the aliens say, ‘We attack at dawn.'” -James Corden

“A man in New York yesterday bought a $10 million winning lottery ticket while at a convenience
store to buy treats for his dog. Which came as a major disappointment to his dog. ‘You didn’t get the treats?'” -Seth Meyers

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
You’ve all heard of the Air Force’s ultra-high-security, super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as “Area 51?” Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area 51 were very surprised to see a Cessna landing at their “secret” base. They immediately impounded the aircraft and hauled the pilot into an interrogation room. The pilot’s story was that he took off from Vegas, got lost, and spotted the Base just as he was about to run out of fuel. The Air Force started a full FBI background check on the pilot and held him overnight during the investigation. By the next day, they were finally convinced that the pilot really was lost and wasn’t a spy. They gassed up his airplane,
gave him a terrifying “you-did-not-see-a-base” briefing, told him Vegas was that-a-way and sent him on his way. The next day, to the total disbelief of the Air Force, the same Cessna showed up again. Once again, the MP’s surrounded the plane…only this time there were two people in the plane. The same pilot jumped out and said, “Do anything you want to me, but my wife is in the plane and you have to tell her where I was last night.” 😳😁😎

Fridays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“This is espresso, you know? It’s like Coffee-zilla.”

Answer: Godzilla!
This is a reference to the Japanese film monster named Godzilla and infers great strength. The movie is about a metal alien who falls from space and is discovered by Hogarth Hughes, who is about 10 years old. The exchange takes place between Hogarth and adult friend Dean, who is played by Harry Connick Jr. They are in a public establishment and Hogarth is trying to convince Dean that he is big enough to drink an espresso. The best monsters as well as the best cups of coffee are usually big and strong.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“What is this demilitarized zone? Whatever it is, I like it! Gets you on your toes better than a strong cup of cappuccino.”

Friday’s Quizzler is….
Can you unscramble the names in Part 1 and match them with what
they are famous for in Part 2? And your answer is?

Part 1

MMAADUHM IAL
EETASLB
AONDLR EGRANA
OARWDH HHGSEU
AYR RSELACH
VLSIE REELYSP

Part 2

Businessman, movie producer and aviator.
First real rock and roll star and first rock star to crossover into films.
Oldest president elected when he took office.
Inducted into the Blues Hall of Fame, Rock and Roll’s Hall of Fame and received Life Time Achievement Award.
Boastful boxer who suffers from Parkinson’s disease.
Song group who shaped music and an entire generation.

Answer: 1. Muhammad Ali: Boastful boxer who suffers from Parkinson’s disease.

Beatles: Song group who shaped music and an entire generation.
Ronald Reagan: Oldest president elected when he took office.
Howard Hughes: Businessman, movie producer and aviator.
Ray Charles: Inducted into the Blues Hall of Fame, Rock and Roll’s Hall of Fame and received Life Time Achievement Award.
Elvis Presley: First real rock and roll star and first rock star to crossover into films.

Monday’s Quizzler is…….
I am three words,
Two of them appear the same,
Two are pronounced the same.
One is the third person use of “capable” or “permit”.
One means to sleep, but only for a bit.
The last word means a group of deer,
Perhaps now you can tell me, what words are here?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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