Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


Here’s The Story…..
The hospital’s consulting dietician was giving a lecture to several community nurses from the Southampton area of Hampshire. ‘The rubbish we put into our stomachs and consume should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is terrible. Fizzy drinks attack
your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with msg. Vegetables can be disastrous because of fertilizers and pesticides and none of us realizes the long-term damage being done by the rotten bacteria in our drinking water. However, there is one food that is incredibly dangerous and we all have, or will, eat it at some time in our lives. Now, is anyone here able to tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?’
A 65-year-old nursing sister sitting in the front row stood up and said, ‘Wedding cake.’ 😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY people,
stay safe, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

“A new study reveals that the average fast-food chicken nugget is almost 60 percent fat.
The study also says that the average fast-food customer is almost
60 percent chicken nuggets.” -Conan O’Brien

“An Arizona bank robber was recently arrested after he applied for a job with his local police
department. They busted him after they asked, ‘Where do you see yourself in five years?’
and he said, ‘In jail for robbing a bank.'” -Seth Meyers

“There are a lot of things to dislike about L.A.: traffic, pollution, people. But it’s important
sometimes to stop and appreciate the fact that, A) We don’t have to scrape ice off our windshield
every morning, and B) I can wear the same pair of teal-colored dolphin
shorts to work every day since 1985.” -Jimmy Kimmel

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Bad weather meant I was stuck overnight at O’Hare airport in Chicago. Along with hotel
accommodations, the airline issued each passenger a $10 meal ticket, or “chit.” That
evening after dinner I presented my meal ticket to the cashier.
“Is this chit worth $10?” I asked.
Looking up nervously, the cashier responded, “I’m sorry, sir. Was the meal that bad?”😳

Tuesdays’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “
“Do you like to gamble, Eddie? Gamble money on pool games?”
“Fats, let’s you and I shoot a game of straight pool.”

Answer: The Hustler
In this scene pool hustler “Fast Eddie” Felson (Paul Newman) meets Minnesota Fats (Jackie Gleason), who is acknowledged to be the best pool player in the country. Eddie is anxious to play Fats and thinks he can beat him. Fats says line one and Eddie replies with line two. After a few hours of playing, Eddie is winning but professional gambler Bert Gordon (George C. Scott), who is watching the match, says to Fats, “Stay with this kid. He’s a loser.” There are quite a few thought-provoking scenes in this movie discussing the relative importance of talent vs. character in winning. In case you haven’t seen it yet, I won’t spoil it for you by revealing the outcome! In the 1962 Academy Awards, “The Hustler” won two Oscars and was nominated for Best Picture but lost to “West Side Story.” Paul Newman, Jackie Gleason, George C. Scott, Piper Laurie and director Robert Rossen were all nominated for awards but didn’t win. Real-life boxer Jake LaMotta (the subject of Martin Scorsese’s movie “Raging Bull”) has a minor role in “The Hustler” as a bartender. Paul Newman reprised the role of “Fast Eddie” Felson in the 1986 movie “The Color of Money,” but this time he was the teacher and Tom Cruise played the talented but cocky newcomer.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Do you promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?”
“And then some.”

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
A Tom Swifty is a play on words. Tom speaks, and the way he is said to speak is a pun. Both meanings of the pun could be true.
e.g. “I love hot dogs”, Tom said frankly.
“Frank” describes how he spoke and relates to the hot dog! [Frankfurter!]

Choose one of the listed words or phrases to fill each gap.

** CLUES **

  1. “I was adopted,” said Tom _.
  2. “Pass the playing cards,” said Tom _.
  3. “I know the square root of 64,” said Tom __.
  4. “The prisoner escaped down a rope,” said Tom __.
  5. “None of my teeth have had any decay yet,” said Tom __.

Choose one of the listed words to fill each gap.

belatedly condescendingly congenially considerately gracefully ideally precariously suddenly transparently unwittingly

** BONUS **
Complete this one yourself and write your answer as a “Comment”.

“This is tedious”, said Tom _.

Answer: 1. transparently

  1. ideally
  2. considerately
  3. condescendingly
  4. precariously

Scroll down for explanations and some related trivia…

  1. Trans = across; so from one set of parents to another
  2. I deal (the cards)
  3. Consider 8 (the square root of 64!)
  4. A con (short for convict) descending
  5. Pre = before; carious in an adjective describing decayed bones or teeth
    Victor Appleton was the pen name used collectively by a number of different writers of the various adventures of Tom Swift, adventurer and inventor. In the books, almost all of Tom’s remarks were written with an adverb or adverbial phrase. From this style, the term “Tom Swifty” has come to be used for this form of word play.

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
For each of the following fill in the best answer to the saying or definition on a separate sheet of paper. The # of blanks are given in or after the clue. After, repeat the small answers (in order) until you get the larger word. For the clues that refer to the alphabet, pronounce the letter as it is pronounced in the alphabet. You might have to repeat the smaller words over and over again to get the larger word. An example is given below.

A) expert: _ _ _
B) devoted church woman : _ _ _
C) 3rd in the alphabet: _
D) # after seven: _ _ _ _ _
E) to avoid: _ _ _ _


Try the following.

1) Chocolate urge:
A) arch of hair above eyes: _ _ _ _
B) joint connecting thigh and calf: _ _ _ _

2) Bright News:
A) another word for ground: _ _ _ _ _
B) “_ _ _ _ in peace”
C) “Send” in past tense: _ _ _ _

3) A Shot of energy:
A) 19th in alphabet: _
B) lay stress on: _ _ _ _ _
C) 15th in alphabet: _

4) Driver:
A) to display: _ _ _ _
B) animal hair: _ _ _

5) Lucky Ducky:
A) # after three: _ _ _ _
B) to _ _ _ _ gum
C) crochet or weave: _ _ _ _

6) Indulge yourself:
A) abbr. of volume: _ _ _
B) “a _ _ _ _ of coal”
C) to masticate: to _ _ _ _
D) Another word for “we”: _ _

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at,


CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.
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