by eucman

Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELC0ME to MONDAY MAY 13. 2024

Here’s The Story…..
Dewey was having a lot of difficulty in French class. To encourage him, his teacher
said, “You’ll know you’re really beginning to get it when you start dreaming in French.”
Dewey ran into class all excited one day, saying, “Teacher, teacher! I had a dream
last night and everyone was talking in French!”
“Great!” said the teacher; “what were they saying?”
“I don’t know,” Dewey replied; “I couldn’t understand a word they were saying.”😳
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a GREAT MONDAY, people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

One shop owner asks another, “So, have you had any responses to
your ad that you’re looking for a night watchman?”
“Yeah, we got robbed last night.”

An older man was on the operating table, about to be operated on by his son.
Just before they put him under, he asked to speak to his son:
“Don’t be nervous, boy, just do your best and just remember, if anything happens
to me your mother is going to come and live with you.”

A young man walked into our insurance office to purchase coverage for his new
motorcycle. Only one question confused him. “Do you have a lien holder on the vehicle?”
“I’ve got a kickstand,” the prospect replied. “Is that the same thing?”

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes
Needing to look up a phone number while at a friend’s house, my teenage
daughter asked for a phone book. She might as well have asked for a papyrus scroll.
“A phone book?” asked her friend.
“You know,” said my daughter. “A book with numbers in it.”
“Oh,” said her friend as it dawned on her. “You mean a math book.” 😳😳

Friday’s’ Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
This movie is about two young cousins who are shipwrecked on an island. They fall in love and have a baby.

Answer: The Blue Lagoon!
Henry De Vere Stacpoole wrote “The Blue Lagoon” in 1908. Brooke Shields won the Golden Raspberry Award for Worst actress. The sequel to “The Blue Lagoon” debuted in 1991. “The Blue Lagoon” is about two young cousins who are shipwrecked on an island. They fall in love and have a baby. Years later Richard’s father comes to the island. After drifting on the ocean for days, Richard and Emmeline wake and find Paddy has eaten poisonous berries. Richard and Emmeline then eat the berries themselves.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this about???
This movie is about a family staying at a hotel for the winter in Colorado. Danny, the son has psychic powers
and tries to warn his father about the ghosts.

Friday’s Quizzler is….​
We’re all nuts .. can you name us?

  1. Big country in South America.
  2. A pod is my pad.
  3. This came down in Germany.
  4. Confection ingredient.
  5. Sneaking a look-on.
  6. Gorillas show dominance by beating this.
  7. May be found in the company of a witch.

Scoring:
1-3 right. Sorry, you’re normal.
4-5 right. I’m beginning to worry about you!
6-7 right. Definitely certifiable nut expert!

ANSWER: 1. Brazil

  1. Peanut
  2. Walnut (The Berlin wall)
  3. Coconut
  4. Pecan (Peek on)
  5. Chestnut (Gorillas drum on their chest as a threat)
  6. Hazelnut (Witch Hazel)

Monday’s Quizzler is….​
Jessica, Matt, Chris, Ellen, and Tony are five students having the surnames Saunders, Alvarez, Mason, Tan, and Locke (not necessarily in that order) assigned to each read a different book and write a book report on them. But their teacher, unluckily, has forgotten which student is supposed to read which book! Help her figure out the students’ full names, assigned books, and presentation dates from the clues below.

Students: Jessica, Matt, Chris, Ellen, Tony
Surnames: Saunders, Alvarez, Mason, Tan, Locke
Books: Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Gone With the Wind, War and Peace, Oliver Twist
Days: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday

  1. Jessica, Chris, and the girl reading War and Peace plan to write their reports together on Monday night.
  2. The 5 students are Matt, the girl presenting on Wednesday, the guy presenting on Tuesday, the kid reading Gone With the Wind, and Chris Saunders.
  3. No person has the same first and last initials.
  4. Miss Alvarez is presenting on Wednesday, while Pride and Prejudice is being presented on Monday.
  5. Locke is mad he is the first to present, but Chris is happy because he is last.
  6. Miss Tan wanted to read either Jane Eyre or War and Peace, but Tony and Ellen wound up reporting them instead.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com., https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.

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