WELCOME to THURSDAY JULY 16th, 2026
Here’s The Story….
As you may have guessed from the title, once upon a time, there was a cowboy, named Sam Smedley. As you may also have guessed, he had a nasty disposition. In particular, if someone else beat him at the rodeo, Sam would send him one of two things, via the Internet. (What you might not have guessed is that this takes place in the modern era!)
If Sam felt that the other cowboy beat him by some sort of trickery or sheer luck, he would send him a picture of some kind of dung. Which kind he would send depended mainly on how badly he thought he had been cheated. If it were merely a bit of luck, it might be human dung. A bit worse would be horse dung. If he were feeling very cheated, and downright ornery, he might send a picture of coyote dung, or even snake dung. In between were things like cow, dog, cat, mouse, sheep, and many other types of dung. Sam wasn’t all that bad at rodeo things, but he wasn’t all that great either, so he got beaten quite a lot… and naturally, most of the time he thought it was by trickery or sheer luck.
On the other hoof, on the rare occasions where Sam felt that the other cowboy won fair and square, he would send a large, high-resolution, autographed photograph of the woman he loved. This was, of course, Dale Evans. (No, the Nasty Cowboy is not Roy Rogers, may he rest in peace! Naturally, Dale Evans didn’t even know that Sam existed.)
Eventually, much to most rodeo people’s relief, Sam died. Despite his lack of sportsmanship or outstanding talent, he was somewhat well known in the rodeo circuits, to both fans and cowboys alike. Therefore, some fellow cowboys (some bunch of clowns, perhaps?) decided that someone ought to write and publish his biography.
The book proceeded smoothly, through Sam’s parentage, birth, childhood, adolescence as a ranch hand, early adulthood in an assortment of manual labor jobs, and even the beginnings of his rodeo career. However, when it came to his bizarre way of “congratulating” those who bested him, they were torn between telling the truth, and not speaking ill of the dead. In the end, truth won out, because the biographers decided that the email of the feces is more Smedley than the Dale. 😯
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a WONDERFUL THURSDAY ‘people, stay safe,
and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman! 😁
Funniest Quotes……
“I finally found a machine at the gym that I like: the vending machine.
“”I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984,
but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.”
“My wallet is like an onion. Every time I open it, it makes me cry.”
“I always say ‘Morning’ instead of ‘Good morning’—if it were a good morning,
I’d be sleeping and not talking to people.”
“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
“Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?”
“If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.”
“No man goes before his time — unless his boss leaves early.” — Groucho Marx
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!
Which member of “The Breakfast Club” was the jock?
Answer: Andrew! The 1985 John Hughes film, “The Breakfast Club”, featured six high school students required to come to a Saturday detention at school. The cast included Emilio Estevez as Andrew Clark, the jock, and Anthony Michael Hall, as Brian, the brain. John Bender was played by Judd Nelson. Claire Standish was portrayed by Molly Ringwald, and Molly Ringwald rounded out the students playing Claire.
Thursdays July Movie Trivia of the day!
William Zabka played the role of the villain, Johnny Lawrence, in which 1984 movie?
Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
In this teaser you have been given two (2) clues in each line. Each answer to the clue comprises six (6) letters. Each 6-letter word differs by only one (1) letter, which I have given you. Your task is to discover the answers to the clues provided. The order of the letters do not change.
Example:
Remove _ _ _ I _ _ / _ _ _ U _ _ Justify
Answer:
E X C (I) S E / E X C (U) S E
- Confuse R _ _ _ _ _ / C _ _ _ _ _ Bovines
- Invent _ _ _ _ T _ / _ _ _ _ S _ Furrow
- Endured _ A _ _ _ _ / _ I _ _ _ _ Tilted
- Joking _ _ N _ _ _ / _ _ R _ _ _ Bargain
ANSWER: 1. Rattle Cattle
2. Create Crease
3. Lasted Listed
4. Banter Barter
Thursday’s Quizzler is….😎😎
Hans Ernest Froopaloop, Jr. wants to drive his motorboat across a lake. At the same time, Heather wants to swim across the lake. So, Heather dons her gorgeous white string bikini and jumps into the lake at the same time Hans starts his motor.
They both follow exactly the same path and maintain a constant speed. Hans’s motorboat’s speed is exactly ten times as fast as Heather’s swimming speed.
However, when Hans is three-quarters of the way to the destination, the motorboat runs out of gas. Then it decides to ignore Newton’s First Law and immediately comes to a complete stop.
Now poor Hans has to row his boat the rest of the way. But he is such a slow rower, and Heather is such a fast swimmer, that she swims exactly four times as fast as he rows.
Who will reach the destination first?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! 😎 Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com: https://elisabethluxe.com., http://www.themuscleministry.com.
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. 😳😳
The World According to the Eucman! 