Welcome, ‏to Monday August 9th.  OLD BASKETBALL players never die, they just go on dribbling

OLD BEEKEEPERS never die, they just buzz off

OLD BIKERS never die, but they’re hard on tires

OLD BIOLOGISTS never die, they just ferment away

OLD BLONDES never fade, they just dye away

OLD BOOKKEEPERS never die, they just lose their figures

OLD BOOKS never die, they just go out-of-print

OLD BOWLERS never die, they just end up in the gutter

OLD BRAKES never die, they just grind down

OLD BRIDGE PLAYERS never die, they just lose their finesse

OLD BRIDGE PLAYERS never die, they just sit around on their fat aces

OLD BUDGETS never die, they are fillibustered

OLD BUREAUCRATS never die, they just waste away

OLD BURGLARS never die, they just steal away

OLD BUSINESSES never die, they just get consolidated
  
Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace I am outta here! 
 
 
Q u o t e s  o f  t h e  d a y
 
Robert Schmidt 01………..
 
I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don’t know what to feed it.

I made a chocolate cake with white chocolate. Then I took it to a potluck. I stood in line for some cake. They said, “Do you want white cake or chocolate cake?” I said, “Yes”.

I saw a vegetarian wearing a furry coat. So I looked closer. It was made of grass.

My aunt gave me a walkie-talkie for my birthday. She says if I’m good, she’ll give me the other one next year.

I eat Swiss cheese from the inside out. But I only nibble on it. I make the holes bigger.

I had amnesia once or twice.

I bought a million lottery tickets. I won a dollar.

I rented a lottery ticket. I won a million dollars. But I had to give it back.

I got a chain letter by FAX. It’s very simple. You just FAX a dollar bill to everybody on the list.
  
G u a r a n t e e d  t o  R o l l  Y o u r  E y e s 

Shakey went to a psychiatrist. “Doc,” he said, “I’ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there’s somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there’s somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. “you gotta help me, I’m going crazy!” “Just put yourself in my hands for two years,” said the shrink. “Come to me three times a week, and I’ll cure your fears.”  “How much do you charge?”
“A hundred dollars per visit.” “I’ll sleep on it,” said Shakey. Six months later the doctor met Shakey on the street. “Why didn’t you ever come to see me again?” asked the psychiatrist.  “For a hundred buck’s a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars.” “Is that so! How?” “He told me to cut the legs off the bed!”  

____________________________________________________________________________________

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???? “No, I am your father”.    

Answer: Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back! This is the famous quote by Darth Vader to Luke Skywalker. When Darth Vader asks Luke if he knows what happened to his father Luke says that Darth Vader killed him. Darth Vader then goes on to say, “No, I am your father.” “The Empire Strikes Back” is the second installment of the original Star Wars trilogy. It tells the further story of Luke Skywalker and of the Rebellion’s fight against the Empire. Luke, a Jedi Knight in training, must rescue his friends from the Empire, but in the process must personally face Darth Vader.    

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!  What movie is this quote from???? “1.21 gigawatts?! 1.21 giawatts?!” With increasing incredulity, Dr. Brown is unable to fathom how he is going to come up with the power necessary to complete his task.

 ____________________________________________________________________________________
 
Friday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2005, try and identify which song or which artist.”  “You can dress me up in diamonds, you can dress me up in dirt, you can throw me like a lineman, I like it better when it hurts”   

ANSWER: “La La” by Ashlee Simpson! “La La” is pretty cool. I love Ashlee Simpson’s album, “Autobiography”. This was the third single off of it. Everyone seems to hate Ashlee Simpson now ever since the SNL thing where she was caught lip-synching, but I still like her.

Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2005 try and identify which song or which artist.”  “I need an alarm system in my house so I know when people are creepin’ about, these people are freaking me out (these days)” 

____________________________________________________________________________________
 
Friday’s Quizzler is..  

Your task is to change ONE letter in each of the following eight words to discover a common theme.
LOIN
STEAL
BILLET
FRYING
CLANK
LINE
CAKE
STEED

Answer:  Lois, Steel, Bullet, Flying, Clark, Lane, Cape, Speed  

Monday’s Quizzler is…  

What are your answers to the respective questions so that your answers to all the questions are correct?

——————————————

Question 1
The answer to Question 2 is:
A. B
B. C
C. A

Question 2
The first question with correct answer B is:
A. Question 3
B. Question 1
C. Question 2

Question 3
The only answer you have not chosen yet is:
A. A
B. B
C. C  

=================================================================
Answers in TUESDAY’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com.  YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
MY FAVORITE LINKS2 CHECK OUT:  www.slampi.org.  ww.hopeBUILD.org. www.Eucmaninc.net. www.wcscatering.com., www.Beaumont77.com.  www.newnorthsideconferencecenter.net., www.schoons.com., www.awj-law.com.