WELCOME to Monday, February 28, 2010. Ponderings for the day…..

Whatever happened to preparations A through G?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

So what’s the speed of dark?

Why don’t they just make mouse-flavored cat food?

I just got skylights put in my place. The people who live above me are furious.

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?

Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?

If it’s tourist season, why can’t we shoot them?

Isn’t Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

Hey I’m just saying! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!

q u o t e s o f t h e d a y

As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. Author Unknown

A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist. Franklin P. Jones

It’s always been and always will be the same in the world: The horse does the work and the coachman is tipped. Author Unknown

What you discover about life’s shell game is that it’s hardest to follow the pea when you’re the pea. Robert Brault

An unwatched pot boils immediately. H.F. Ellis

If you wonder where your child left his roller skates, try walking around the house in the dark. Leopold Fechtner

Anything you lose automatically doubles in value. Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. Will Rogers

When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time. Author Unknown

How is it that one match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box of matches to start a campfire? Christy Whitehead

G u a r a n t e e d t o m a k e y o u l a u g h
Harvey’s grandfather clock suddenly stops working right one day, so he loads it into his van and takes it to a clock repair shop. In the shop is a little old man who insists he is Swiss, and has a heavy German accent. He asks Harvey, “Vat sims to be ze problem?” Harvey says, “I’m not sure, but it doesn’t go ‘tick-tocktick -tock’ anymore. Now it just goes ‘tick…tick…tick.'” The old man says, “Mmm-Hm!” and steps behind the counter, where he rummages around a bit. He emerges with a huge flashlight and walks over the grandfather clock. He turns the flashlight on, and shines it directly into the clocks face. Then he says in a menacing voice, “Ve haf vays of making you tock!”
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Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer?What movie is this quote from???‘Son, you got a panty on your head.  

Answer: Raising Arizona. From the convenience store scene.
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! ‘How much movie trivia can you answer? What movie is this quote from???‘Fried pork rinds anyone?’

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Friday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2000 -2002, try and identify which song or which artist. “Everybody look at me, me, I walk in the door, you start screaming”.

Answer: Nelly Furtado! In Nelly Furtado’s 2006 “Maneater” she sings these lyrics. It has a very nice beat and makes you want to get up and dance! 

Monday’s Crazy Song Definitions, This quiz features popular songs from 2003-2007 try and identify which song or which artist.“Everybody listen all over the world, I got a story about my favorite girl”.

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Friday’s Quizzler is..

You are an expert on paranormal activity and have been hired to locate a spirit haunting an old resort hotel. Strong signs indicate that the spirit lies behind one of four doors. The inscriptions on each door read as follows:

Door A: It’s behind B or C
Door B: It’s behind A or D
Door C: It’s in here
Door D: It’s not in here

Your psychic powers have told you three of the inscriptions are false, and one is true. Behind which door will you find the spirit?
Answer: The spirit lies behind Door D.
If the spirit is behind Door A, then both B and D are true.
If the spirit is behind Door B, then both A and D are true.
If the spirit is behind Door C, then A, C, and D are all true.
If the spirit is behind Door D, then the statements on all the doors are false, except for that on Door B. This matches the rules, and therefore, the resort hotel spirit lurks behind Door D.

Monday’s Quizzler is…
Below are 3 pairs of words. Find the words that fit in the middle of each pair of words to create two new words, one front-ended and one back-ended.

Example: EVER – ______ – HORN
Answer: EVER – GREEN – HORN

1. GRAND – _________ – OUT
2. QUARTER – ___________ – MIND
3. HAIR – _______________ – FIRE 

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Answers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman @ eucstraman@hotmail.com. YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT THE EUCMAN’S DAILY BLOG ONLINE@ https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/