WELCOME to Thursday, December 28, 2017.
New Old Computing Sayings…
The Internet has changed everything, even these tried and true traditional sayings:
Wherever I lay my @, that’s my home.
The email of the species is deadlier than the mail.
A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.
Great groups from little icons grow.
Speak softly and carry a cell phone.
Don’t put all your hypes in one home page.
Pentium wise, pen and paper foolish.
The modem is the message.
The geek shall inherit the earth.
A chat has nine lives.
Don’t byte off more than you can view.
Fax is stranger than fiction.
What boots up must come down.
Windows will never cease.
In Gates we trust (and our tender is legal).
The words of the Prophets are written on the Facebook wall.
Virtual reality is its own reward.
Modulation in all things.
There’s no place like home dot com.
Oh, what a tangled Web site we weave when first we practice.
A user and his leisure time are soon parted.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday
people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
“I was thinking about Santa Claus. When you really think about it, this has to be
the biggest, most elaborate prank in the history of the world. It’s like we’re all in
on a huge joke we’re playing on kids. And eventually they figure it out and
they start lying to their kids, too.” -Jimmy Kimmel
“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.” -Matt Groening
“There was an 11-hour power outage at the airport in Atlanta. And people were
stranded on the tarmac for six hours. Don’t worry, though, flight attendants came
through every hour with a thimble-size cup of room temperature water.” -Jimmy Fallon
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
I’m a driving examiner for the state of Indiana, and while I was giving a road test to a young man, he went through a red light without stopping. I told him that he had automatically failed the test.
We met up with his mother back at the office, and I explained what had happened. At first she was speechless. Then she asked incredulously, “He ran a red light?”
“Yes,” I replied.
“Well,” persisted the mom, “how red was the light?” 😐
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
‘Women. Nice ones, the most frigid of the race, it doesn’t matter in the end. Inside they’re all the same meat and gristle and hatred just simmering.’
ANSWER: In the Company of Men! Aaron Eckart’s character said this line in Neil LaBute’s delectably misogynistic film. He and a coworker decide to each seduce a deaf woman working at their office, just for the sport of it. Another quote that pretty much sums up the attitude of the character is ‘Never trust anything that can bleed for a week and not die.’
Fridays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??
Donnie Smith: ‘I’m sick and I’m in love.’
Thurston Howell: ‘You seem the sort of person who confuses the two.’
Donnie Smith: ‘That’s right. That’s the first time you’ve been right. I confuse the two and I don’t care.’
Thursday’s Quizzler is……….
The Jones family of Ohio is entertaining their cousin Henry, who is visiting from Belgium.
After staying for several days, Henry is getting ready to leave, when he presents the Jones with a gift. It is a lamp that Henry claims is a very valuable antique that has been in his family for 70 years. It has small Bohemian figures that dance around the base when the lamp is turned on. Henry plugs it in to show the family how it works.
After Henry leaves, the father looks at his family, and says, “While it may be a pretty lamp, and it was nice of Henry to give it to us, it is not a Belgian antique.”
Why is the father so sure?
ANSWER: An antique lamp from Belgium would not have a plug that would fit into a standard outlet in North America. The father noted that the plug was a sealed plug not a replacement one and therefore was the original installation.
He obviously bought it at a local store.
Friday’s Quizzler is……….
Each group of three definitions describes three words that are spelled the same, except for one letter (each group describes a different set of words). Example: king, ring, wing.
1b) to sleep lightly
1c) a measured quantity
3b) to secretly observe
3c) an enclosure for pigs
4a) to direct
TODAY’S QUIZZMASTER OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. ANDREA L. BANKS! 🙇🙇🙇🙅
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/