WELCOME to Wednesday, January 17, 2018.
New Old Computing Sayings
The Internet has changed everything, even these tried and true traditional sayings:
Wherever I lay my @, that’s my home.
The email of the species is deadlier than the mail.
A journey of a thousand sites begins with a single click.
Great groups from little icons grow.
Speak softly and carry a cell phone.
Don’t put all your hypes in one home page.
Pentium wise, pen and paper foolish.
The modem is the message.
The geek shall inherit the earth.
A chat has nine lives.
Don’t byte off more than you can view.
Fax is stranger than fiction.
What boots up must come down.
Windows will never cease.
In Gates we trust (and our tender is legal).
The words of the Prophets are written on the Facebook wall.
Virtual reality is its own reward.
Modulation in all things.
There’s no place like home dot com.
Oh, what a tangled Web site we weave when first we practice.
A user and his leisure time are soon parted.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Wednesday
people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!
“The CEO of Domino’s Pizza announced that he is stepping down this summer. He’ll
carefully pack up his office, then get home and find that all his stuff is
stuck to the top of the box.” -Jimmy Fallon
“According to a new report, America’s teenagers are 30th in the world in math.
Luckily, America’s teenagers will never understand the report because
they’re 85th in reading.” -Conan O’Brien
“Big news from the Oxford English Dictionary. For all of you kids who don’t know
what a dictionary is, it’s a small portion of the Internet, printed out, kept on a shelf,
and opened once every three years during a Scrabble game.” -Jimmy Kimmel
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
Neighbors of ours had a terrible disagreement over a patio they wanted for their
backyard. The wife had rather grand ideas, while the husband wanted costs kept to
a minimum. The wife won out, and the construction bill climbed higher and higher.
I dropped by one day, when the patio was near completion, and was surprised to
find the husband smiling from ear to ear as the workmen smoothed over the surface.
I remarked how nice it was to see a grin replace the frown he had been wearing lately.
“You see where they’re smoothing that cement?” he replied.
“I just threw my wife’s credit cards in there.” 😐😁😎
Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
‘Get out, go anywhere you want, go to a hotel, go live with her, and don’t come back! Because, after 25 years of building a home and raising a family and all the senseless pain that we have inflicted on each other, I’m damned if I’m going to stand here and have you tell me you’re in love with somebody else!’
ANSWER: Network! Louise Schumacher (Beatrice Straight) goes off on her husband (William Holden) when he tells her about the affair he’s having with a network exec (Faye Dunaway).
Wednesdays Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??
‘You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That’s where I’ll always love you, Peter Pan. That’s where I’ll be waiting.’
Tuesday’s Quizzler is……….
The following clues refer to the names of several young women, in the form of Miss Suchandsuch. These names then actually form a new word (although there will be a spelling difference with one s missing) For example, “This young woman obeys all the rules” would be misbehave (Miss Behave)
Can you figure out the rest of the words?
1. This young woman is in great shape.
2. This young woman is very generous at Christmas.
3. This young woman showed me where to go.
4. You could tell this young woman all your secrets.
5. This young woman knew exactly what I meant.
6. This young woman is exactly the right choice.
7. This young woman could lead the orchestra.
ANSWER: 1. Misfit 2. Misgiving 3. Misguided 4. Mistrust 5. Misunderstood 6. Misappropriate 7. Misconduct
Wednesday’s Quizzler is……….
A man’s life was at an all time low. He lost his job, his wife, his house; and now his mom just died in a car accident.
After the funeral, a man approached him and told him that his mom had taken a mortgage on the house and
left him nothing except one thing. It was a note that read:
Dear my only son,
Thhaenrge! Tmhoe Bnaecykiyarsd
After he read the note, he finally got a smile on his face. What did his mom tell him in the note?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/