Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


WELCOME to Friday March 23, 2018.

Play with Words – Illogical, Yet Funny English Language…
The market garden was designed to produce produce.
The city tip was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
In the boat, a row erupted among the oarsmen about how to row.
The nurse wound the crepe bandage around the wound.
Dessie decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
Chloe was too close to the door to close it.
When Ted saw the tear in the painting he shed a tear.
How can I intimate my thoughts to my most intimate friend?
Sherrie shed her shoes in the shed.
In terms of weight lead is in the lead.
Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
When the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
Why do our noses run but our feet smell?
I did not object to the object.
Freddie filled in his form by filling it out.
Why do performers recite a play, yet play at a recital?

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful weekend people, and whatever you do,don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!


He who has health has hope, and he who has hope has everything. – Arabian Proverb

No road is long with good company. – Turkish Proverb

I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders. – Jewish Proverb

Shared joy is double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow. – Swedish proverb

Failure teaches success. – Japanese Saying

By learning you will teach; by teaching you will understand. – Latin Proverb

A half truth is a whole lie. – Yiddish proverb

The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials. – Chinese Proverb


G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

In a court in Tralee, deep in County Kerry, Ireland, this conversation is reported to have taken place:
Lawyer: ‘At the scene of the accident, Mr O’Brien, did you tell the Garda officer that you had never felt better in your life?’
O’Brien the old farmer: ‘That’s right, sir.’
Lawyer: ‘Well then, Mr O’Brien, how is it that you are now claiming you were seriously injured when my client’s car hit your cart?’
O’Brien the farmer: ‘When the Garda arrived, he went over to my horse, who had a broken leg, and shot him.
Then he went over to Darcy, my dog, who was badly hurt, and shot him. When he asked me how I felt, I just thought under the circumstances, it was a wise choice of words to say I’ve never felt better in my life.’


Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
“Maybe God has a bigger plan for me than I had for myself. Like this journey never ends. Like you were sent to me because I’m sick. To help me through all this. You’re my angel.”
ANSWER: A Walk to Remember!

This quote is said by Jamie Sullivan, to Landon Carter. It takes Jamie and Landon a while to get together in the movie, but eventually they are together. However, once they are together Landon discovers that Jamie is very sick and will not live much longer. Throughout the movie Jamie is very positive and never gets angry about being sick. She always makes the best of things. Jamie is played by Mandy Moore, and Landon is played by Shane West.

Fridays Movie Trivia of the day!
‘You were suppose to fire UP! WE both fired up! It’s like living with a six year old!’


Thursday’s Quizzler is………. 

In the four sentences below, are two blanks. You must fill them in with words that are either anagrams, synonyms,
antonyms, or homonyms. You can only use each of these one time each sentence. Can you figure out each word?

1. The golfer has yelled out “____,” ____ times today.

2. They began to ____ scones, and drink ____.

3. She used one ____ to look down at her wrist and see her ____.

4. He ran ____ the dog in order ____ not get bitten by it.

ANSWER:  1. The golfer has yelled out “FORE,” FOUR times today. (homonyms)

2. They began to EAT scones, and drink TEA. (Anagrams)

3. She used one EYE to look down at her wrist and see her WATCH. (Synonyms)

4. He ran FROM the dog in order TO not get bitten by it. (Antonyms)

Friday’s Quizzler is……….
Using the following hints, how can you get from the first word to the fourth word to the seventh word?

Word 2 is a synonym of Word 1. One letter of the second word has been changed to make Word 3.
Word 3 was changed to present tense to make Word 4. Word 5 is a synonym of Word 4.
One letter was removed from Word 5 to make Word 6. Word 7 is a synonym of Word 6.

Giant _____ _____ Bite _____ _____ Chop

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at

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