WELCOME to Thursday May 24, 2018.
2. A day without sunshine is like, night.
3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
4. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
5. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
7. I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
8. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
9. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges
10. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
11. Remember half the people you know are below average.
12. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?
13. Nothing is fool-proof to a talented fool.
14. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
15. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
16. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
17. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
18. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
19. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
20. I intend to live forever – so far so good.
21. Borrow money from a pessimist – they don’t expect it back.
22. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
23. My mind is like a steel trap – rusty and illegal in 37 states.
24. Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
25. The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
26. Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.
27. When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.
28. If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
29. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
30. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!
“Google has created several new emojis aimed at empowering women. So congratulations women, you asked for equal pay and you got five new emojis.” -Conan O’Brien
“A 70-year-old woman in India recently gave birth to a baby boy. The baby and his mother are doing fine. The doctor, however, is still recovering.” -Seth Meyers
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
ANSWER: A Walk to Remember!
Jaime Sullivan, the daughter of a preacher, and Landon Carter, a local bad boy, spent time together, that helped him through school punishments he was given. Landon fell in love with Jaime, and found out she had leukemia for the past two years. Jamie said this to him after she told him that she had leukemia.
Trimethylxanthine is an addictive drug that increases alertness, improves concentration, and gives you a euphoric feeling. It operates using the same mechanisms that amphetamines, cocaine, and heroin use to stimulate the brain only to a lesser
degree. When the coffee was tested it was found that it did contain large amounts of Trimethylxanthine. But, Mr. Jones did not win his lawsuit. Why?
Answer: Trimethylxanthine is also known as caffeine.
Maybe your car does 0 to 60 in 10 sec., but can you do this “0 to 10” in 60 sec.? Go on – get out the stopwatch!
The hint provides the starting letters of the even numbered words.
1. String for a guitar (or maybe even for wearing?)
2. “Exempli gratia”
3. Stage of a journey
4. Narrow valley, in Scotland
5. Messenger from God
6. Friendly, affable, or cheerful
7. Genealogy or ancestry
8. Jelly base (older spelling)
9. Uplifting or moving up
10. One who preaches, hoping listeners will convert; Gospel writer