Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Monday July 16, 2018.

Pondering out loud……….. 
Why is it that when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

If you have your finger touching the rear view mirror that says–“objects in mirror are closer than they appear”, how can that be possible?

Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?

If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?

Why is it called a TV “set” when you only get one?

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Why does an alarm clock “go off” when it begins ringing?

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

Why does “cleave” mean both split apart and stick together?

Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!


I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die
of natural causes. Author Unknown

She’s the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong. Mae West

If you cannot answer a man’s argument, all it not lost; you can still call

him vile names. Elbert Hubbard

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Author Unknown

She was what we used to call a suicide blond – dyed by her own hand. Saul Bellow

It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged

off me during school term. Mark Twain

Protect me from knowing what I don’t need to know. Protect me from even  knowing that there are things to know that I don’t know. Protect me from  knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not  to know about. Amen.  Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

An  elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle  asleep
on a log. So, he ambled on over and kicked it clear across the  river.

“What did you do that for?” Asked a passing giraffe.

“Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago.”

“Wow, what a memory” commented the giraffe.

“Yes,” said the elephant, “turtle recall”. 😁😎

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “Spiders! Why couldn’t it be ‘follow the butterflies’?” 

ANSWER: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. When Ron and Harry find the cave of Aragog, Ron blatantly shows his disgust for spiders.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???“What’s your favorite scary movie?”



Friday’s Quizzer is…….

I am partially baked.
I am not completely lit.
I am a portion of the moon.
I am lesser than full wit.
I am a divider of the hour.
I am not a total lie.
I am a sibling through one parent.
Can you guess….what am I???

Answer:  HALF
half baked, half lit, half moon, half wit, half past the hour, half truth, half brother/sister. 

Monday’s Quizzer is…

Below are 3 pairs of words. Find the words that fit in the middle of each pair of words to create two new words, one front-ended and one back-ended.

Example: EVER – ______ – HORN

1. LENGTH – _______ – CRACK
2. WITH – _______ – OVER
3. MAKE – _______ – LESS

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at


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