Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!


WELCOME to Monday August 13, 2018.

1. Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.
2. There’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.
3. Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that’s how dogs spend their lives.
4. Don’t worry about the world ending today…It’s already tomorrow in Australia.(unless you’re in Australia -then start worrying)
5. Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.
6. Character is what you are. Reputation is what people think you are.
7. Drive carefully. It’s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
8. A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work..
9. A man usually feels better after a few winks, especially if she winks back.
10. Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
11. The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
12. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
13. If at first you don’t succeed … well, so much for sky diving.
14. A man who says marriage is a 50-50 proposition doesn’t understand two things: 1 – Women, 2 – Fractions.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people,

and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace I am outta here, Eucman!😁😎


“Laugh, even when you feel too sick or too worn out or tired.
Smile, even when you’re trying not to cry and the tears are blurring your vision.
Sing, even when people stare at you and tell you your voice is crappy.
Trust, even when your heart begs you not to.
Twirl, even when your mind makes no sense of what you see.
Frolick, even when you are made fun of. Kiss, even when others are watching.
Sleep, even when you’re afraid of what the dreams might bring.
Run, even when it feels like you can’t run any more.
And, always, remember, even when the memories pinch your heart.
Because the pain of all your experience is what makes you the person you are now.
And without your experience—you are an empty page, a blank notebook, a missing lyric.
What makes you brave is your willingness to live through your terrible life and hold your head up high the next day.
So don’t live life in fear. Because you are stronger now, after all the crap has happened, than you ever were back before it started.”
― Alysha Speer

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

Some tips for Seniors…
I came across this exercise suggested for seniors, to build
muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. It seems so easy,
I thought I’d pass it on.

The article suggested doing it three days a week. Begin by
standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of
room at each side.

With a 5-lb. potato sack in each hand, extend your arms
straight out from your sides, and hold them there as long as
you can. Try to reach a full minute, then relax.

Each day, you’ll find that you can hold this position for
just a bit longer. After a couple of weeks, move up to 10-lb.
potato sacks.

Then 50-lb. potato sacks, and then eventually try to get to
where you can lift a 100-lb. potato sack in each hand and
hold your arms straight for more than a full minute.

Once you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each
of the sacks. 😁😎

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  “Two more months.” B: “Two more months.”


ANSWER: Fargo! Marge Gunderson (Frances McDormand) is one of the few pregnant women in the movies whose birthing process is not depicted in the third reel. The film ends with a still-pregnant Marge and her husband lounging in bed, speaking the above lines. “Fargo”, interestingly enough, is not in any way the story of Marge’s pregnancy — nor is she a resident

of Fargo, ND! She is a Brainerd, MN police officer assigned to investigate a multiple homicide that leads her to uncover a botched kidnapping scheme in Fargo.

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Ernest Hemingway once wrote: ‘The world is a fine place, and worth saving.’ I agree with the second part.”

Friday’s Quizzer is…….

In this teaser you have been given two (2) clues in each line. Each answer to the clue comprises six (6) letters.
Each 6-letter word differs by only one (1) letter, which I have given you. Your task is to discover the
answers to the clues provided. The order of the letters do not change.


Remove _ _ _ I _ _ / _ _ _ U _ _ Justify


E X C (I) S E / E X C (U) S E

1. Confuse R _ _ _ _ _ / C _ _ _ _ _ Bovines

2. Invent _ _ _ _ T _ / _ _ _ _ S _ Furrow

3. Endured _ A _ _ _ _ / _ I _ _ _ _ Tilted

4. Joking _ _ N _ _ _ / _ _ R _ _ _ Bargain


1. Rattle Cattle
2. Create Crease
3. Lasted Listed
4. Banter Barter



Monday’s Quizzer is…

Starting with a one-letter word or abbreviation, add a letter and rearrange the letters to produce the next. A clue is given for each.

Maybe your car does 0 to 60 in 10 sec., but can you do this “0 to 10” in 60 sec.? Go on – get out the stopwatch!

The hint provides the starting letters of the even numbered words.

1. Describing a 180 degree turn
2. Greek’s 13th letter
3. e.g. Macadamia, pecan, or acorn
4. Large fish, usually found in small cans
5. Mum’s sisters
6. Remove (someone) from position of power
7. Crazy person – or a container for #3!
8. Creatures of Greek mythology: half man and half horse
9. More loyal and devoted
10. Most slovenly or grubby; most earthy or vulgar

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at

LINKS:, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store

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