Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Wednesday August 22, 2018.

Here’s the story… 

My  first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the axe. After  that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow.  Next I’ tried working in a muffler factory, but  that was exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn’t cut it.

I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn’t cut the mustard. My best job was being a musician, but  eventually I found I wasn’t note worthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn’t have any patience.
Next was a job in a shoe  factory; I tried, but I just didn’t fit in. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income. I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell. I managed  to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work  was just too draining. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!
Have a wonderful Wednesday people, and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP!
Peace I am outta here, Eucman!😁😎

DAILY QUOTES… 

“If you wish to glimpse inside a human soul and get to know a man, don’t bother analyzing his ways of being silent, of talking, of weeping, of seeing how much he is moved by noble ideas; you will get better results if you just watch him laugh. If he laughs well, he’s a good man.” ― Fyodor Dostoyevsky
“Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can; all of them make me laugh.” ― W.H. Auden
“Laughter is more than just a pleasurable activity…When people laugh together, they tend to talk and touch more and to make eye contact more frequently.” ― Gretchen Rubin

 

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

A waitress became violently ill while at work and was rushed
by ambulance to the emergency room. In typical hospital
fashion, she was placed on an examining table and then all
but ignored for the next half-hour. Finally, she noticed a doctor out in the hall
and yelled, “Please help me!”  “Sorry,” he replied, “it’s not my table.”😐😱😁😎

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???  “Hello, Jack. Are you of the Boston Dawsons?” “No, the, uh, Chippewa Falls Dawsons, actually.” 

ANSWER: Titanic! In this scene Jack Dawson (Leonardo DiCaprio) has joined a group of first-class passengers on the RMS Titanic at dinner, as a reward for saving the life of Rose Bukater (Kate Winslet) and has just been introduced to millionaire John Jacob Astor (Eric Braeden). Astor says this first line and Dawson replies with the second. “Titanic” tells the true-life story of the luxurious White Star ocean liner RMS Titanic that sank in 1912 on its maiden voyage, through the lives of two main fictional characters, Jack Dawson and Rose Bukater.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???

“Tom, can you get me off the hook? For old times’ sake?”  “Can’t do it, Sally.”

Tuesday’s Quizzer is…….

What do the following words have in common?
CONQUERED
ALSO
FRONT
DEVOURED
ATTACKS
Answer: All of the words are synonyms of words that sound like numbers:
Won (one)
Too (two)
Fore (four)
Ate (eight)
Sics (six) 


 


Wednesday’s Quizzer is…

The Agents of F.C.I. have amusing anagrams to match their characteristics, for example, AGENT SOUL, whose name anagrams to LANGOUSTE, likes seafood. Try to determine the Anagrams for the following Agents.

AGENT DEE is very young.

AGENT YIP specializes in Pharaohs and Sphinxes.

AGENT MIC has attractive abilities.






LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

LINKS: http://www.slampi.org., http://www.hopeBUILD.org. www.GodLovesPraise.com. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#

Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store

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