Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Friday August 31, 2018.

Eleven Step Guide to Being Handy Around the House..
1. If you can’t find a screwdriver, use a knife.
If you break off the tip, it’s an improved screwdriver.

2. Try to work alone. An audience is rarely any help.

3. Despite what you may have been told by your mother, pray-
ing and cursing are both helpful in home repair … but only
if you are working alone.

4. Work in the kitchen whenever you can … many fine tools
are there, its warm and dry, and you are close to the
refrigerator.

5. If it’s electronic, get a new one … or consult a
twelve-year-old.

6. Stay simple minded: Get a new battery; replace the bulb
or fuse; see if the tank is empty; try turning it to the “on”
switch; or just paint over it.

7. Always take credit for miracles. If you dropped the alarm
clock while taking it apart and it suddenly starts working,
you have healed it.

8. Regardless of what people say, kicking, pounding, and
throwing sometimes DOES help.

9. If something looks level, it is level.

10. If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.

11. Above all, if what you’ve done is stupid, but it works,then it isn’t stupid.😎

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Labor day weekend people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace I am outta here, Eucman!😁😎

DAILY QUOTES…

“There is no greater power than that of a laugh and happiness is a force which can save a

person from the horrors of the world.” ― Hillary DePiano,

“The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can’t fake it…try to fake three laughs

in an hour — ha ha ha ha ha — they’ll take you away, man. You can’t.” ― Lenny Bruce

“Humor can make a serious difference. In the workplace, at home, in all areas of life – looking for a reason to laugh is necessary. A sense of humor helps us to get through the dull times, cope with the difficult times, enjoy the good times and manage the scary times.” ― Steve Goodier

“Humanity takes itself too seriously. It is the world’s original sin. If cavemen had known how to laugh, history would have been different.” ― Chuck Klosterman

“Worry is the secret weapon perpetrated upon us by the dark forces of the world that lurk in the shape of fear, uncertainty, confusion, and loss. We, on the other hand, have our own secret weapon against these incorporeal fiends. It is laughter.” ― Vera Nazarian

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

Because I couldn’t unplug the toilet with a plunger, I had
to dismantle the entire fixture, no small feat for a non-
plumber.

Jammed inside the drain was a purple rubber dinosaur, which
belonged to my five-year-old son.

I painstakingly got all the toilet parts together again, the
tank filled, and I flushed it. However, it didn’t work much
better than before! As I pondered what to do next, my son
walked into the bathroom.

He pointed to the purple dinosaur I had just dislodged and
asked excitedly, “Did you get the green one, too?” 😐

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “I seen a wolf in everybody I ever met and I see a wolf in you.” “Like a wolf, huh? You never seen a wolf in your life”

ANSWER: Moonstruck! In this scene Loretta Castorini (Cher) goes into the Sweetheart Liquor Store to buy a bottle of champagne and the middle-age couple behind the counter are in middle of a discussion. She says the first line and her husband replies with the second line. Then he adds, “You know what I see in you, Lotte? The girl I married.” She is caught off guard and blushes. Loretta smiles on her way out. “Moonstruck” was nominated for Best Picture in the 1988 Academy Awards but lost out to “The Last Emperor.”

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “This could be the worst disaster NASA’s ever faced.” “With all due respect, sir, I believe this is gonna be our finest hour.”

Thursday’s Quizzer is…….

For each of the following four words, come up with another English word that uses all THE SAME letters but in a different

order. The four words you come up with will rhyme with one another.

ONSET
NEWS
WRONG
HORNET

Answer:

STONE
SEWN
GROWN
THRONE

Friday’s Quizzer is……

What common household item wouldn’t have become popular if it wasn’t for another invention in 1928 (it didn’t take off until 1930)?😐

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

LINKS: http://www.slampi.org., http://www.hopeBUILD.org. www.GodLovesPraise.com. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#

Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store

http://www.amazon.com

Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store