Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Wednesday September 19, 2018.

Today we take a look at the top five puns of the day!

1. Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself?

2. Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.

3. What is the purpose of reindeer? It makes the grass grow, sweetie.

4. There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided. At last report, the survivors were marooned.

5. The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and asked, “Did you get my drift?”

6. Why is Saudi Arabia free of mental illness? There are nomad people there. Hey no- mad people..get it?😐 OK,

That’s my story and I’m sticking too it! HAVE A WONDERFUL WEDNESDAY PEOPLE! And whatever you do,don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

DAILY QUOTES…

“Humanity takes itself too seriously. It is the world’s original sin. If cavemen had known how to laugh, history would have been different.”
― Chuck Klosterman

“laughter is a necessity in life that does not cost much, and the Old Ones say that one of the greatest healing powers in our life is the ability to laugh.”
—Larry P. Aitken

Laughter is a good stress eliminator. Laughter causes healing powers to be distributed through our bodies. Laughter helps heal relationships

that are having problems. Laughter can change other people. Laughter can heal the sick. Laughter is spiritual. One of the greatest gifts among

Indian people has been our ability to laugh. Humor is natural to Indian people. Sometimes the only thing left to do is laugh.
Great Spirit, allow me to laugh when times get tough.”
― Larry P. Aitken

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

My husband works in a former supermarket that was remodeled
to accommodate professional offices. One day he overheard
his receptionist giving directions over the phone. “Remember
the old grocery store?” she asked the caller. “Well, you’ll
find us in the meat department.”😱😁

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “Watch what I can do. Come on. It’s alright. Look. The water’s stiff.”

ANSWER: Thumper! The animated film “Bambi” was produced in 1942 by Walt Disney. It was directed by David Hand and written by Felix Salten (the novel), Larry Morey (the story adaptation) and Perce Pearce (the story direction). It is a wonderful story of the adventures of a fawn named Bambi, and his friends Thumper, Flower, Friend Owl and Faline. The film shows exquisite animation through the journey of Bambi as he grows up, falls in love and becomes a strong buck. There are heartbreaking events and heartwarming scenes throughout the movie.

Thumper says this wonderful quote to Bambi, as they discover the frozen pond. Thumper pounds his foot on the ice and wiggles his little nose as he coaxes Bambi to step foot on the ice. Bambi slides and wobbles. His unsteady legs go every which way. Eventually, Thumper gets Bambi back on his feet and pushes him along the ice. This is when Bambi see Faline, the immediate love of his life.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Six feet three and a half inches. Now let’s stick to the facts.”

Tuesday’s Quizzer is…….

Complete the words below using each letter of the alphabet once only:
li_ _t
_o_an
pu_ _ le
_-r_ _
e_ _l
_ _eer
_cie_ _e
g_ _ let
_u_ge
_ac_et
pu_zl_
_rai_

Answer:

light
woman
purple
x-ray
evil
queer
science
goblet
fudge
jacket
puzzle
trail

Wednesday’s Quizzer is……

George is dead. He was found face down in the street, squashed nearly flat. He must have been there some time as he

was cool to the touch. In addition, when he was found, there was a bird perched on the back of his head.

Who is George?😎

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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