WELCOME to Thursday October 11, 2018.
1. There is no such thing as child-proofing your house.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 4 years-old’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. Quiet does not necessarily mean don’t worry.
5. Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
6. Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
7. You shouldn’t throw baseballs at the ceiling fan when on.
8. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
9. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
10. PB&J sandwiches do not fit into DVD players.
11. When you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh-oh;” it’s already too late.
12. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
13. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock despite
a 36-year-old man saying it can only be done in the movies.
14. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
15. If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball
cleats it does not leak – it explodes.
16. Dish soap mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
17. Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old.
18. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
19. Gorilla glue is forever.
20. No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.
21. Pool filters do not like Jello.
22. A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life (unfortunately, mostly in retrospect).
alone.” –Anthony Burgess
―
A hug at the right moment and a kind shoulder to lean on,
Is the sprinkle of magic that keeps us walking towards hope.”
―
“Although my mother didn’t know anything about science, she had a great influence on me as well. In particular, she had a wonderful sense of humor, and I learned from her that the highest form of understanding we can achieve are laughter and human compassion” ―
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….
over town. That meant, as a customer service rep for the
electric company, I was dispatching repairmen right and
left.
When one lineman called a customer to get her exact address,
he was told, “I’m at Post Office Box 99.”
The weary lineman replied, “Ma’am, I’ll be coming to you in
a truck, not an envelope.”
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “I can’t swim.” “Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill ya.”
ANSWER: Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid! In the events leading up to this scene Butch Cassidy (Paul Newman), The Sundance Kid (Robert Redford) and their gang have just robbed a train. However, one of the train cars contains a posse of mounted Pinkerton detectives, who immediately give chase. The gang splits off, but the posse continues to trail Butch and Sundance up in mountainous country. When they are confronted by a steep drop off to a river, Sundance prepares to fight to the death. Butch suggests they instead jump and Sundance says no. When Butch persists, Sundance says the first line. An amused Butch replies with the second. Newman and Redford really did leap off a facsimile of the cliff but they landed on a mattress roughly six feet below. The actual death-defying jump was made by stunt men (although they actually are filmed jumping off a large crane into a lake). In the 1970 Academy Awards, “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” was nominated in seven categories, including Best Picture (but lost to “Midnight Cowboy”). It did win four Oscars.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Open the pod bay doors, HAL.” “I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.”
Wednesday’s Quizzer is…….
Starting letter: A
Clues:
1. sodium
2. one, some, every, or all
3. greenish blue
4. careful and shrewd
5. Grand ——
NA
ANY
CYAN
CANNY
CANYON
The Grand Canyon leaves all who experience it with a sense of wonder, magic and awe. From its dramatic 5000 foot deep,
Thursday’s Quizzer is……
Yet I’m seen only when all around me is cold.
For most of the time you just live and ignore me;
Then you gasp for me, stop for me, mutter below me.
You might say, in surprise, I’ve been taken away,
But it’s true I’ve been with you, at least ’til today.
When I leave you, you leave too!
Who am I?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAY’S Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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