Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers, and Teases

WELCOME to Wednesday January 2, 2019.
Signs and symptoms of inner peace:

* A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on past experiences.
* An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.
* A loss of interest in judging other people.
* A loss of interest in judging self.
* A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.
* A loss of interest in conflict.
* A loss of the ability to worry. (This is a very serious symptom.)
* Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation.
* Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.
* Frequent attacks of smiling in any situation.
* An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.
* An increased susceptibility to the love extended by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.

WARNING: If you have some or all of the above symptoms, please be advised that your condition of inner peace may be so far advanced as to not be curable. If you are exposed to anyone exhibiting any of these symptoms, remain exposed only at your own risk.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! HAVE A GREAT WEDNESDAY PEOPLE! Whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman! 

Since spaghetti is now ‘pasta’ and a TV set is a ‘home entertainment system,’ the manager of my grocery store did his best to jazz up the lowly egg. He still has some work to do. A sign he put up in the dairy section advertised “Boneless Chicken.”

When I go to casinos, the most ridiculous sign I see is the one that says…”If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER.” So, I call them and say, “I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What do I do?”
Before I could enroll in my company’s medical insurance plan, I needed to fill out a questionnaire. As expected, the form was very thorough, leaving nothing to chance. One question asked, “Do you think you may need to go to the emergency room within the next three months?”
G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

Students at school were asked to write about the harmful environmental effects of oil on fish. One 11-year old wrote, “When my mom opened a tin of sardines last night it was full of oil and all the sardines were dead.”😱

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???
“You’re not so tough without your car, are ya?”


Answer:  Kindergarten Cop!
In “Kindergarten Cop” (1990), Phoebe O’Hara (played by Pamela Reed) has been badly injured by Eleanor Crisp. Eleanor Crisp and her son Cullen Crisp, Sr. are desperately seeking Cullen’s young son, who is being protected from his evil father. Upon finding him, they stop at nothing to try to kidnap the boy, which is when Eleanor drives her car into Phoebe. Injured and weak, taking a bat in hand and heading to the defense of Detective John Kimball (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger), Phoebe manages to knock Eleanor down and out with a baseball bat while expressing this great quote, “You’re not so tough without your car, are ya?”

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???

“Every man… every man has to go through Hell to reach paradise.”


Monday’s Quizzer is…….

What do the following words have in common?

Answer: If you take the first letter and move it to the rear of the word, you get the same word when read backwards.

Wednesday’s Quizzer is…….

Follow these steps and see if you can figure this out.

1) Get a brown, cardboard box.
2) Get purple, orange, and turquoise paints.
3) Paint the box orange.
4) Paint on purple spots.
5) Paint on turquoise stripes.
7) Turn it upside down.
8) Lie on your side.

What is missing from this sequence?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store


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