Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon,
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.go., abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts— the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does “varicose” mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term “Caesarean Section”
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome
Q: What does the word “benign” mean?’
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.😳😱😁😎
“A dog in Seattle is making news after commuters noticed it had been riding
“Police are looking for a woman who stole $3,000 worth of cat-grooming
On my first day working at the gas station, I watched a senior co-worker measure the level of gasoline in the under ground tanks by lowering a giant measuring stick down into them. “What would happen if I threw a lit match into the hole?”
I joked. “It would go out,” he replied very matter-of-factly.
“Really?” I asked, surprised to hear that. “Is there a lack of oxygen down there or
“No,” my co-worker continued. “The force from the explosion would most likely blow it out.”😳
“Hancock, I’ve got lunatics laughing at me from the woods. My original plan has been scuppered now that the
“Couldn’t hurt, sir.”
Answer: A Bridge Too Far!
In this scene British Major General Robert Urquhart (Sean Connery) has just experienced the Murphy’s Law that maintains, “If anything can go wrong, it will go wrong.” He is part of Operation Market Garden, an ambitious (but failed) attempt by the Allies to end World War II in Europe quickly. The plan was to use airborne paratroopers to secure three bridges behind German lines and then link up with a ground thrust by the British 30 Corp, allowing easy access over the Rhine River into Germany. General Urquhart’s part of the plan was to lead the British First Airborne Division in capturing the bridge over the Rhine at Arnhem, the Netherlands. However, Allied bombing released inmates from an insane asylum, who laughed at Urquhart’s troops, jeeps that were supposed to arrive never did, and the radios had the wrong crystals and were useless. A frustrated General Urquhart says line one and Corporal Hancock (Colin Farrell) replies with line two.
“Auda will not come to Aqaba. Not for money… for Feisal… nor to drive away the Turks. He will come… because it is his pleasure.”
“Thy mother mated with a scorpion.”
A spoonerism is a pair of words that can have their initial sounds switched to form new words. The pairs need only sound the same, not necessarily be spelled the same (power saw & sour paw, horse cart & coarse heart). There may sometimes be one or two connecting words (kick the stone & stick the cone, king of the rats & ring of the cats). Given the following definitions, what are the spoonerisms?
1) a lock’s companion and a bright-colored tropical bird & a vegetable and a vegetable
2) a chilly tome & a courageous chef
3) a mournful song & a spoiled cold dish of vegetables served with dressing
4) an excavation of an underground ore deposit in Geneva & the winner of a beauty pageant sponsored by pig farmers
2) cold book & bold cook
3) sad ballad & bad salad
4) Swiss mine & Miss Swine
1. It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s a…
B _ _ _ _ _ N
2. Body modification.
T _ _ _ _ O
3. A Group of people.
C _ _ _ _ _ _ _ E
4. Acuteness or acumen.
K _ _ _ _ _ _ S
—Experts Only!—
5. Kangaroos, dingos, and kookaburras!
C _ _ _ E
The World According to the Eucman! 