Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Friday March 1, 2019 
WICOE (Women In Charge Of Everything) is proud to announce the opening
of its “EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN!”  The course covers two days, and topics covered include:

DAY ONE
HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS. Step by step guide with slide presentation.
TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS?  Roundtable discussion.
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR. Practicing with hamper (Pictures and graphics).
DISHES & SILVERWARE; DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES? UNDERSTANDING

THE LOGIC OF WASHING DISHES BEFORE YOU PUT THEM INTO THE DISHWASHER! Debate among a panel of experts.
REMOTE CONTROLS. Finding the right one in the group, and losing the remote control – Help line and support groups.
LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS. Starting with looking in the right place instead of turning the house
upside down while screaming – Open forum. 
LEARNING HOW TO WORK WITH CLOSET SPACE IN ANOTHER ROOM
BESIDE YOUR BEDROOM. Trauma therapy and patience building.
UNDERSTANDING THE VALUE OF A 1000 SHOES. Learning how to realize the needs, and look the other way.
 
DAY  TWO
EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE TRASH? Group discussion and role play.
HEALTH WATCH; BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH. PowerPoint presentation.
REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST. Real life testimonial from the one man who did.
IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS? 45 Minute driving simulation.
LIVING WITH ADULTS; BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR  PARTNER. Online class and role playing.
HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION. Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques.
REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING OR TEXTING WHEN YOU’RE GOING TO BE LATE. Bring your calendar or cellphone to class.
GETTING OVER IT; LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME. Managing your facial
expressions with smile therapy. (PowerPoint Presentation) 😐😳😌
 
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people and whatever
you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

DAILY QUOTES…

“Astronomers say they now know the approximate weight of the Milky Way. They found this out by adding 10 pounds to the Milky Way’s weight on its Tinder profile.” -Conan O’Brien
“A man in Georgia was arrested for stealing a Krispy Kreme doughnut truck and leading
police on a high-speed chase. The police charged him with one count of grand theft irony.” -Jimmy Fallon

“A survey by the national retail foundation said that some people even give their fish Valentine’s Day gifts. A good way to tell that you’ve lost your mind is if you give your fish a Valentine’s Day gift.” –Jimmy Kimmel

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes…

When I was around 4 years old, I was biting my nails pretty badly and my mother showed me a picture of a child with a very swollen belly due to malnutrition. “That will happen to you if you keep biting your nails,” she told me.
Later that week we were in the supermarket standing in line at the checkout counter behind a lady who was obviously 9 months pregnant. I pointed to her and, in a very loud voice, said, “We know what she has been doing don’t we mommy?”

Have you ever seen your mother try to crawl under a cash register and hide?😱😳😎

 

 

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???

“Go ahead, make my day.”
“Wait a minute, wait a minute, you ain’t heard nothin’ yet.”
Answer:  The Jazz Singer!
“The Jazz Singer” was made in 1927 and was the first feature length movie with synchronised speech. This movie introduced the world to the talkies and saw the beginning of the end for the silent movie era. These are the words uttered by the character, whom Al Jolson was playing, to the audience in the movie who applaud his singing. 
 

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “I watch them, wondering how they can watch you bring their food and clear their tables, and never get that they just met the greatest woman alive. And the fact that I get it makes me feel good, about me.”

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……Harry and his friends decide to share the last of a packet of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor beans. None were impressed with the flavor of their bean, so each decided to show off their skills by casting a different spell on them. Who cast what spell on which bean?  (Note: Primary colors refer to those of pigments, ie blue, red and yellow.)

Friends: Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville and Hagrid
Colors: Green, Blue, Red, Orange and Purple
Flavors: Vomit, Earwax, Cardboard, Snot and Mud
Spell: Vanishing, Speaking, Levitating, Exploding and Growing

1. The boy with the cardboard flavored bean cast a spell which made noise. The earwax flavored bean was very quiet.

2. Harry’s bean was a primary color.

3. Hermione’s bean, which was not purple, grew almost out of control.

4. The red vomit flavored bean was levitated.

5. Hagrid’s bean, which was not a primary color, exploded after a failed illuminating spell.

6. Neville’s orange bean did not speak.

7. The green bean questioned where the orange bean had gone.

8. The snot flavored bean was blue. The green bean did not taste like earwax. The purple bean was mud flavored.

Answer:  Harry levitated the red vomit flavored bean.
Ron made the green cardboard flavored bean speak uncontrollably.
Hermione made the blue snot flavored bean grow.
Neville made his orange earwax flavored bean disappear, much to his disappointment as he wanted it to multiply.
Hagrid exploded his purple mud flavored bean.

 
 

 

Friday’s Quizzler is…….

The Pope has it but he does not use it.
Your father has it but your mother uses it.
Nuns do not need it.
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one,
Michael J. Fox’s is quite small.
What is it?
 
 
 
 

 LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:

http://www.slampi.org, http://www.hopeBUILD.org, http://www.GodLovesPraise.com, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com,

CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#,

Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

 

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