Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Wednesday March 6, 2019 
Here’s the story….. 

The old farmer had a large pond in the back, fixed up nicely
with picnic tables, a barbecue pit, horseshoe courts, and
some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and
fixed up for swimming when it was built.

One evening, the old guy decided to go down to the pond and
look it over. He hadn’t been there for a while. He grabbed a
five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit.

As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing
with glee. As he came closer, he saw it was a bunch of young
women skinny dipping in his pond. As he approached, he made
the women aware of his presence.

At once, they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, “We’re not coming out until
you leave.”

The old man frowned, “I did not come down here to watch you
young ladies swim naked, or to make you get out of the pond
naked.”

Holding up the bucket, he said, “I’m here to feed the
alligator.” 😱😎 That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

DAILY QUOTES…

“Researchers are developing a stay-sober pill that will prevent you from getting drunk off of alcohol. It’s perfect for the drinker who wants all the calories of alcohol but none of the fun.” -Conan O’Brien
“A new study found that women think men holding a guitar are more attractive, even
if they are not playing it. In a related story, guys with an accordion will die alone.” -Jimmy Fallon

“YouTube temporarily pulled a New York zoo’s live stream of a giraffe giving birth. A zoo spokesman said that their YouTube cam had been reported as containing nude content. All animals are nude! Every one of them is nude except for your neighbor’s dog who has to wear those stupid dog outfits that he clearly hates.” -James Corden

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes…

A man pacing back and forth glanced at his watch and yelled
upstairs to his wife, “Honey, are you ready yet?”

Shouting back, the woman replies,

“For crying out loud, Ed, I’ve been telling you for the last
half hour…I’ll be ready in a minute!” 😳😌

 

 

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from???

“Now it isn’t that I don’t like you, Susan, because, after all, in moments of quiet, I’m strangely drawn toward you, but – well – there haven’t been any quiet moments.”
Answer: Bringing Up Baby!
These words are spoken by scientist Dr David Huxley, played by an exasperated Cary Grant, to Susan Vance, played by an irrepressible Katharine Hepburn. Baby is her pet leopard. The film tells the story of Dr Huxley ending up in various and very comical predicaments as a result of the actions of Susan and Baby.

 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….
Once a year, a ballroom dancing extravaganza at the local country club is the social event of the season. Each of five distinguished pairs stole the spotlight in a different dance, earning them not only the admiration of all those present but also a romantic dinner for two at the club on an evening of their choice. From the information provided, determine the husband and wife who comprise each couple and their shared surname, as well as the type of dance in which each couple excelled.

Husbands: Andrew, Bradley, Logan, Nathan, Stewart
Wives: Audrey, Lorraine, Margaret, Phyllis, Vanessa
Surname: Kavanaugh, Levy, Moylan, Northrop, Powell
Dance: Fox Trot, Jitterbug, Mambo, Tango, Waltz

1. Bradley (who didn’t do the jitterbug) isn’t Mr. Northrop.

2. Phyllis’s surname is Moylan

3. Neither Margaret (who isn’t Ms. Northrop) nor Audrey is either the woman who danced the jitterbug with Mr. Levy (who isn’t Nathan) or the one who danced the tango with her companion.

4. Stewart (who isn’t surnamed Levy) isn’t the man who danced the fox trot and Vanessa wasn’t his partner.

5. Neither Audrey nor the woman who danced a stunning waltz is married to Mr. Powell (who isn’t Bradley).

6. Lorraine didn’t dance the tango.

7. Audrey isn’t Ms. Northrop and Margaret isn’t the woman who danced the mambo with her husband.

8. Andrew’s last name is Kavanaugh.

Answer: Andrew & Audrey Kavanaugh; mambo
Bradley & Phyllis Moylan; tango
Logan & Vanessa Levy; jitterbug
Nathan & Margaret Powell; fox trot
Stewart & Lorraine Northrop; waltz

 
 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….

A magazine competition invited people to come up with “invented” inventions of the cyber-age. For example, a solar powered clothes drier (a rope) and a hand-held word processor (a pencil). Can you guess what this is?

It is a portable arcade. A hand-held amusement resource with no cartridges or batteries. Access games of speed, dexterity, memory, cunning. Produce magical effects or construct lofty towers. Some games can increase your income.


 
 
 
 

 LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:

http://www.slampi.org, http://www.hopeBUILD.org, http://www.GodLovesPraise.com, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com,

CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#,

Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

 

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