Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Thursday April 11, 2019


WEEKEND PUNOGRAPHY…..

1. Can you cry under water?

2. Do fishes ever get thirsty?

3. Why don’t birds fall off trees when they sleep?

4. Why is it called a building when it is already built? 

5. When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?

6. If money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches?

7. Why does round pizza come in a square box?

8. Why doesn’t glue stick to its bottle?

9. People say “Bless you” when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a mili-second.

10. Hummingbirds are the only birds that can fly backward.

11. Women use 72 different muscles everytime they talk. 😎

12. Gorillas burp when they are happy.

13. Every day is about 55 billionths of a second longer than the day before it.

14. Strawberries have more vitamin C than oranges.

15. A snail would take about 220 hours to crawl ONE Mile (1.6km)

 

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

 

DAILY QUOTES…

“A new study has found that being good-looking can hurt a man’s career because the

people in charge of hiring see attractive men as a threat. So if you’re a man who was
recently hired for a new job, congratulations. You’re hideous.” -James Corden
 
“Scientists believe the first modern Europeans mated with Neanderthals. This is the oldest evidence yet of beer goggles.” -Conan O’Brien 
 
“I was thinking about doing something to my wife on April Fools’ Day but then I thought,
you know what, tricking her into marrying me was more than enough prank.” -Jimmy Kimmel

 
 
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
I was recovering from surgery when a charity representative phoned asking me to take part
in a door-to-door fund-raising effort.
“Sorry,” I replied, “but I’ve been incapacitated.”
Undaunted, the caller kept trying to convince me to change my mind and volunteer.
I interrupted and said, “I’m incapacitated. Do you know what that means?”
She hesitated. “It means your head was cut off?”😳

 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “I’m making waffles!” 

Answer: Donkey in the movie “Shrek”

The correct answer is of course Donkey in the movie ‘Shrek’ The full quoye, said to Shrek, the ogre is, ‘We’ll stay up late swapping manly stories, and in the morning, I’m making waffles!’ Not surprisingly, Shrek wasn’t impressed.

This film was released in 2001 and it won the very first Academy Award for Best Animated Feature Film in the same year. The story takes viewers to a fairy tale setting where an ‘evil’ ogre, Shrek, must save and protect Princess Fiona and deliver her to the antagonist, Lord Farquaad. In the particular scene from which the quote is pulled, Shrek has saved Donkey early on in the movie, and Donkey is looking to Shrek to be his friend. When Shrek decides to let him come to his swamp, Donkey has plans to settle right in.


Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Well, you know what they say: if you don’t have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me!”

 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…. Can you find 13 animals hidden in these words?

Pheasantoadderaturtleechareelionewtiger

 Answer: Pheasant, ant, toad, adder, rat, turtle, leech, char, hare, eel, lion, newt, tiger. 


 

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is……. Complete the words below using three consecutive letters in alphabetical order,  e.g. _ _ A _ U S; add A B and C it would become ABACUS.

1. F _ _ R I _,

2. T H I _ _ _,

3. A _ U _ _ A,

4. _ _ _ I N E,

5. A _ _ _ T E,

6. _ _ _ A C K.

 

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:

http://www.slampi.org, http://www.hopeBUILD.org, http://www.GodLovesPraise.com, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com,

CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#,

Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

 

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