Tuesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

when-someone-says-you-look-just-like-yo-mama

WELCOME to Tuesday April 23, 2019

Here’s the story..

Traveling down the interstate and needing to use the bath-
room, I stopped at a rest area and headed to the restrooms.

I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the
the stall saying: ‘Hi, how are you?’

I’m not the type to start a conversation in the restroom and
I don’t know what got into me, but I answered, somewhat
embarrassed, ‘Doin’ just fine.’

And the other person says: ‘So what are you up to?’

What kind of question is that? At that point, I’m thinking
this is too bizarre so I say: ‘Uhhh, I’m like you, just
traveling.’

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can
when I hear another question. ‘Can I come over?’

Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I
could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell them
‘No..I’m a little busy right now!’

Then I hear the person say nervously… ‘Listen, I’ll have
to call you back. There’s an idiot in the other stall who
keeps answering all my questions. 😳

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a happy Tuesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

 

DAILY QUOTES…

“If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the
impersonators would be dead.”
– Johnny Carson

“I would rather be a coward than brave because people hurt
you when you are brave.”
– E. M. Forster

“Nobody in the game of football should be called a genius.
A genius is somebody like Norman Einstein.”
– Joe Theismann
“Women will forgive anything. Otherwise, the race would have
died out long ago.” —Robert Heinlein
“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water
there is bacteria.” -Ben Franklin

Being happy doesn’t mean everything’s perfect; it just means
you’ve decided to see beyond the imperfections. –Unknown

 

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….

The church I serve has a summer ministry at a chapel. At
our first service last summer, the chairman of the Board of
deacons met me at the door with the Information that there
were no offering plates to be Found. None of the men wore
hats, and he thought it Undignified to pass a shoe. He had
tried to borrow Something suitable from a house nearby, but
no one Was home.

When I went to the chancel to begin the service, the problem
was still unsolved. Time came for the offering, and two
ushers walked down the aisle wearing broad grins and carrying
shiny receptacles. The deacon had resourcefully borrowed two
hubcaps from a parishioner’s car. 😱

 

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”

Answer: When Harry Met Sally!
“When Harry met Sally” is a movie about the relationship of two people, Harry Burns and Sally Albright, who meet occasionally over a course of twelve years. They try to remain friends while having other relationships. At the end of the movie, Sally is at a New Years Eve party, and is about to leave when Harry shows up. He says this to Sally because he realizes that he is in love with her! They kiss and end up getting married!

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Do you mind if we stay here awhile, or must you go home?”

 

Monday’s Quizzler is….

Well hello there, new friends
It’s a pleasure to meet you
I wonder if you’d indulge
The unique way I greet you

You see, I’m a player
Of a great many games
So instead of just telling you,
Maybe try guessing my name

Now to make this more fair
I’ll give you some clues
For there are so many ways
That my name is used

My family is royal
Though as has oft been spoken
The headgear I once wore
Has since become broken

In my more playful moods
I might hide in a box
Or just run around, for
I’m nimble as a fox

But please don’t misjudge me;
I’m not some lame slacker
I can work hard with a hammer
To become a road cracker

If I see you in trouble
At the side of the road
I’ll be right there to help
If it eases the load

I’m brave in the darkness,
When it’s black, call my name
But I get rather scary
When I’m high on a plane

All right, one last clue
Then let’s call it a night:
I’ll give you a grin
As an October light

So now that we’ve ended
This fun guessing game
Now can you tell me
Just what is my name? 🤔
Answer: I am Jack.

– My family is royalty in a deck of cards, King, Queen and JACK.

– My headgear (or crown) was broken in the nursery rhyme “JACK and Jill”.

– I hide in a box as a JACK in the Box

– In another nursery rhyme, I’m told “JACK be nimble…”

– I work hard as a JACKhammer, being a road Cracker(JACK).

– When you have a flat tire on the side of the road, you need a JACK.

– You call out my name in the game of BlackJACK

– I’m scary on a plane when it’s “high” (as in hiJACK).

– I’ll give you a grin on an October (Halloween) night as a JACK-o’-lantern

– Finally, I’m thin and my wife is fat in the JACK Sprat nursery rhyme. Also, the first letter of each line in the hint spells out “JACK”.

 

 

Tuesday’s Quizzler is…….

Five budding artists are meeting for lunch today at the new Thai restaurant in town. Use the following clues to determine the first (Allie, Billie, Callie, Donnie and Effie) and last (Adams, Booker, Cheek, Devlin and Efferman) names of each artist, along with her favorite medium (Acrylic, Oil, Pastels, Pen and Ink and Watercolor) current focus (Children, Dancers, Fish, Landscapes and Nests) of each artist, along with their “day job” (Banquet Server, Bartender, Cashier, Driver and Teacher.) Nobody shares the same name, favorite medium, current focus or day job with anyone else in the group.

1. The driver has never been drawn to landscapes and the teacher paints with either acrylic or oils. Ms. Efferman is currently focusing on either children or fish. The oil painter is either the bartender or the driver.

2. Billy paints with either acrylic or watercolors. The surname of the driver is either Cheek or Adams. Callie is either Ms. Adams or Ms. Devlin. Donnie uses either acrylic or oil paint. The oil painter is focused on either dancers or landscapes.

3. The watercolorist is either the banquet server or the teacher. The one working with pen and ink is neither Allie nor Effie. The acrylic painter is not focusing on landscapes or dancers. Neither acrylic nor watercolor is used to portray children.

4. Ms. Adams is either the bartender or cashier. Allie either uses pen and ink or is focusing on children. Either Allie or Billy is the banquet server. Ms. Adams’ work portrays either dancers or fish.

6. Effie and the acrylic painter shared a pizza, Ms. Cheek had a salad, while the banquet server and the nest aficionado both had the soup of the day.

 

 

 

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in WEDNESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:

http://www.slampi.org, http://www.hopeBUILD.org, http://www.GodLovesPraise.com, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com, CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

 

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