Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Thursday May 23, 2019 

Here’s the story……

​​Steve Wonder is playing his first gig in Tokyo and the place
is absolutely packed to the rafters. In a bid to break the
ice with his new audience, He asks if anyone would like him to play a request.

A little old Japanese man jumps out of his seat in the first
row and shouts at the top of his voice “Play a Jazz chord!
Play a jazz chord!”

Amazed that this guy knows about the jazz influences in
Stevie’s varied career, the blind impresario starts to play an
E minor scale and then goes into a difficult jazz melody for about 10 minutes.

When he finishes the whole place goes wild. The little old man
jumps up again and shouts “No, no, play a Jazz chord, play a Jazz chord.”

A bit irritated by this, Stevie, being  the professional that
he is, dives straight into a jazz improvisation with his band
around the B flat minor chord and really tears the place apart.

The crowd goes wild with this impromptu show of his technical
expertise.The little old man jumps up again. “No, no. Play a
Jazz chord, play a jazz chord!”

Well now truly irritated that this little guy doesn’t seem to
appreciate his playing ability. Stevie says to him from the
stage “OK, mister, you get up here and do it!”

The little old man climbs up onto the stage, takes hold of the
mike and starts to sing… “A jazz chord to say I ruv you…” 😱

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people & whatever you do, don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

 

DAILY QUOTES…

“Now we sit through Shakespeare in order to recognize the quotations.”
– Orson Welles

“The squeaking wheel doesn’t always get the grease.
Sometimes it gets replaced.” – Vic Gold

“There’s nothing in the world I wouldn’t do for Walter
O’Malley. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me. That’s
the way it is – we go through life doing nothing for each
other.” –Gene Autry

“Start by doing what’s necessary, then do what’s possible,
and suddenly you are doing the impossible.” -Francis of Assisi

“It is sobering to consider that when Mozart was my age he’d
already been dead for a year.” -Tom Lehrer    

 

 

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….

Quasimodo goes to a doctor for his annual checkup.
“I think something is wrong with your back,” the doctor says.
“What makes you say that?” Quasimodo asks.
“I don’t know,” the doctor replies. “It’s just a hunch.” 
😳 

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???  “I told you not to pick up the phone.” “Then stop calling me.”

Answer:  Pretty Woman!
In the events leading up to this scene, rich businessman Edward Lewis (Richard Gere) needs an escort in Hollywood, California for some social functions and he hires prostitute Vivian Ward (Julia Roberts). He takes a liking to her and negotiates for her full time day and night. The interaction of Vivian’s street-savy mannerisms with Edward’s rarified level of society leads to some pretty funny situations. In one scene, Edward takes her to an opera and an old woman asks her how she liked it. She says, “It was so good, I almost peed my pants!” The old woman is surprised at this response and Edward quickly adds, “She said she liked it better than Pirates of Penzance.” In this scene, Edward lets her stay in their suite at the Regent Beverly Wilshire Hotel during the day while he’s gone but instructs her not to answer the phone. To test her he calls their room and she answers. He repeats the instruction and calls again as a test. She answers again and he says line one. She replies with line two. In the 1991 Academy Awards, Julia Roberts was nominated for Best Actress in a Leading Role but lost the Oscar to Kathy Bates in “Misery.” In the scene where Edward is shown playing the piano in the empty hotel lounge, Richard Gere is playing the piano himself.


Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ​”Muriel said the ________ have landed, whatever that means, Chief. And she said they were attacking her personally.”  “Remember last time, when she called about that peeping Tom — you know who that was, don’t you? It was that Luther Grilk’s horse.”

 

 

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….

In this teaser, you have to find the odd ones out in the groups of words. BUT WAIT!
There’s a catch. Each group of words has TWO words which do not belong. Can you find them both?

EXAMPLE:
Lily – Jane – Tulip – Rose
Jane does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a flower.
Tulip also does not belong because it’s the only one which is not a girl’s name.

You’re on your own for the rest!

1. Aqua – Hazel – Willow – Cherry

2. Cat – Sword – Hamster – Dog

3. Prince – Double – Queen – King

Answer:  1. Aqua does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a tree. Willow does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a color.
2. Sword does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a family pet. Hamster does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a type of fish.
3. Double does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a person of royalty. Prince does not belong as it’s the only one which is not a bed size.

 

 

 

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….

Help Beethoven use these clues below to decipher these popular Christmas/Holiday tunes.
Example: A Triad of Monarchs
Answer: We Three Kings

1. Sir Lancelot with laryngitis.
2. Frozen precipitation commences.
3. Oh, member of the round table with missing areas.
4. I envisioned a trio of marine vessels.
5. Do you perceive the same longitudinal pressure that stimulates my auditory sense organs?
6. Leave and do a broadcast on an elevated peak.

Bonus: The apartment of 2 psychiatrists.

 

 

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:

http://www.slampi.org, http://www.hopeBUILD.org, http://www.GodLovesPraise.com, https://elisabethluxe.com, http://www.themuscleministry.com.

 

CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

 

 

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