Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Monday July 8, 2019

Things I learned from a snowman…really…

It’s okay if you’re a little bottom heavy.

Hold your ground, even when the heat is on.

Wearing white is always appropriate.

Winter is the best of the four seasons.

It takes a few extra rolls to make a good midsection.

There’s nothing better than a foul weather friend.

We’re all made up of mostly water.

You know you’ve made it when they write a song about you.

Accessorize! Accessorize! Accessorize!

Avoid yellow snow.

Don’t get too much sun.

It’s embarrassing when you can’t look down and see your feet.

It’s fun to hang out in your front yard.

There’s no stopping you once you’re on a roll.

It’s not the size of the carrot, but the placement that counts.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people & whatever you do,

don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

DAILY QUOTES…

“According to an article about President Trump’s fitness routine, the president often rides a stationary bike onboard Air Force One. Advisers say he pedals really hard because

he thinks he’s powering the plane.” – Conan O’Brien😳😁😎

“I got a simple rule about everybody. If you don’t treat me

right, shame on you.” -Louis “Satchmo” Armstrong

“Life is a mirror: if you frown at it, it frowns back; if you smile,

it returns the greeting.” –William Makepeace Thackeray

“Men, like nails, lose their usefulness when they lose direction

and begin to bend.” –Walter Savage Landor

“Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank

where they have no account.” -Oscar Wilde

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
I wondered if I could get my husband to address Christmas cards, as I had so much to do. I arranged everything we
needed, then hopefully pulled up a chair and said, “Come on, Dear, let’s get these out of the way.”

He glanced at the array on the table, turned away and went into the den, only to return moments later

with a high stack of cards, stamped, sealed, and addressed.
“They’re last year’s,” he said. “I forgot to mail them.

Now let’s go out to dinner and relax.” 😱😳😁😎

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Do you promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?”
“And then some.”

Answer: Chicago!
In this scene 1920’s vaudeville star Velma Kelly (Catherine Zeta-Jones) is being sworn in by a court bailiff in the murder trial of Roxie Hart (Renée Zellweger), a wannabe vaudeville star who has killed her lover after finding out he has lied to her and was never going to make her famous. The court bailiff asks line one and Velma replies with line two. Hart is represented by hotshot defense lawyer Billy Flynn (Richard Gere), who compares the Chicago brand of justice in the 1920s to entertainment (one of the movie’s taglines is “With the right song and dance, you can get away with murder”). In another telling scene Flynn says, “Would you please tell the audience… er … the jury what happened?”

Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Is that what I’m supposed to tell your mother when she gets another folded American flag?”
“You can tell her that when you found me, I was with the only brothers I had left. And that there was no way I was deserting them. I think she’d understand that.”

Friday’s Quizzler is….

A man wanted to encrypt his password but he needed to do it in a way so that he could remember it. His password is 7 characters long. The password consists of letters and numbers only (no symbols like ! or <). In order to remember it he wrote down “You force heaven to be empty.” Can you guess what his password is?

Answer: U472BMT
Try prounouncing the answer “U Four Seven Two B M T”.

Monday’s Quizzler is…….

See if you can figure out the words in this “pyramid” using the hints given below. Each new word contains the same letters as the previous word, plus a new letter.

1) First letter of the English alphabet
2) Present; attending
3) Loves picnics
4) A small biter
5) Pro ballplayers have one
6) An attracting object
7) An article of clothing
8) A heated debate

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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