Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Friday July 26, 2019

Here’s the story….

The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar one day and sat down to drink a beer.

After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said, “Who owns the big white horse outside?” The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said, “I do. Why?” The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, “I just thought you would like to know that your horse is just about dead outside!” The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside and, sure enough, Silver was about dead from heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got him some water and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better. The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, “Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better.” Tonto said, “Sure Kemosabe”, and took off running circles around

Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the bar to finish his drink.

A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and announces, “Who owns that big white horse outside?” The Lone Ranger stands again and claims, “I do. What is wrong with him this time?” The cowboy says to him, “Nothing much, I just wanted you to know – you left your Injun running…😱😳😁😎

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people & whatever you do,

don’t forget to LAFF IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

DAILY QUOTES…

“Television has proved that people will look at anything

rather than each other.” – Ann Landers

“If at first you don’t succeed, failure

may be your style.” – Quentin Crisp

“I think vests are all about protection. The life vest protects you

from drowning, and the bullet-proof vest protects you from getting

shot and the sweater vest protects you from pretty girls.” -Demetri Martin

“I went to the doctor and all he did was suck blood from

my neck. Do NOT go see Dr. Acula!” -Mitch Hedberg😐😎

“Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job,

not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have

the same choice we’ve always had: work or prison.” -Tim Allen.

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….

Did You Know? A ghost’s favorite kind of music is Rhythm and Boos.

The Best way to find a screeching rock star is with a Heavy Metal Detector.

Pop Music goes “Fizz-fizz, bubble-bubble!”

Sad landscapers listen to Blue Grass while they are working.

Chemists listen to acid rock.

Bungee jumpers listen to Big Band Music.

Baseball players listen to Just the hits! 😁😎

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Thank-you for your coffee, seignior. I shall miss that when we leave Casablanca.”

Answer: Casablanca!

Casablanca is located in Morocco, a country famous for its unique coffee. The coffee being savored in this movie would have been very strong, very sweet, and flavored with many spices. The movie, which is set during World War II, is a wonderful romantic drama and garnered three Academy Awards. This line is spoken by Ingrid Bergman to actor Sydney Greenstreet who was playing nightclub owner Senor Ferrari. It was at the end of small talk between the two over coffee in his establishment.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Poor man’s truth serum – caffeine and sugar.”

Thursday’s Quizzler is….

David showed a piece of paper to Kenneth, while covering the top part of it with his hand. The visible portion below his hand read as follows:
THIRD
FOURTH
FIFTH
SIXTH
SEVENTH
EIGHTH
NINTH
TENTH

David said, “My hand is covering two words, the first two words in this list of ten words. The list follows a completely and indisputably logical sequence. None of the words are repeated. I’ll bet you $50 that you cannot tell me what those two words are on your first try. You can say the two words in either order.”

Kenneth could not see any reason not to accept this wager, and said “First and second” for the easy $50 win. However, after David moved his hand away, Kenneth realized he had lost, and indeed, there was not even an argument to be made. What were the two hidden words?

Answer: “Whole” and “Half.” The obvious idea is that the list is of ordinal numbers. However, it is actually a list of the names of the inverse fractions of the natural numbers. That is, 1/1, 1/2, 1/3, etc.

Friday’s Quizzler is…….

Which is the odd couple? Find how these pairs were formed, then decide which does not belong with the other four.

1. HIS and MIST

2. LUSH and PULP

3. LOFT and SOUND

4. WIDE and NINE

5. HIKE and SEED

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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