Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Thursday August 29, 2019

BOSSES BASIC RULES………..

Rule 1: The Boss is always right!

Rule 2: In the impossible hypothesis that a subordinate may be right, Rule 1 becomes immediately operative.

Rule 3: The boss does not sleep; he/she rests.

Rule 4: The Boss is never late; he/she is delayed elsewhere.

Rule 5: The Boss never leaves his/her work; his/her attention is required elsewhere.

Rule 6: The Boss never reads the paper in his/her office; he/she studies.

Rule 7: The Boss never takes advantage of his/her secretary with extra work. He/she educates her.

Rule 8: The Boss is always chief, even in his/her bathing togs.

Rule 9: Whomsoever may enter the boss’s office with an idea of his own must leave the office with the boss’s ideas.

Rule 10: If, in your lamentable ignorance, you fail to grasp the truth, fear not; return to rule 1.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!

Quotes of the Day

“No matter how cynical you get,

it is impossible to keep up.” – Lily Tomlin

“I’ve never owned a telescope, but

it’s something I’m thinking of looking into.”
– George Carlin

“I have an existential map. It has ‘You are

here’ written all over it.” – Steven Wright

“Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.”- Napoleon Bonaparte

“There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.” – Friedrich Nietzsche

“Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.” – Plato

Most people would be angry if their company was bought and the

new owners replaced them with their own people. Not our
neighbor Andy. “You know how it goes,” he said, waxing philosophical.

“Every circus brings its own clowns.”

Following a blowout shindig the night before, a co-worker was looking

the worse for wear. “Are you feeling all right?” I asked. “I don’t know,”

she answered slowly. “I think I’m suffering from post-partying depression.”

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….

As the owner of an old clunker, I was used to dealing with a variety of car breakdowns.

One day at the supermarket, just after I had filled my trunk with groceries, I noticed a

stream of fluid pouring out of the bottom of the car. I knew I had to get home before

the car was once again out of action. When I arrived I asked my husband to take a look

at the problem. Expecting the worst, I braced myself for his diagnosis.

When he came back in, he was smiling. “It’s apple juice,” he said.😁😏😎

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “The horror, the horror.”

Answer: Marlon Brando – “Apocalypse Now”
“Apocalypse Now” is a 1979 movie and starred Marlon Brando as Colonel Kurtz. It is a story about a ‘secret’ mission to find a renegade and mysterious Green Beret Colonel who has fled to Cambodia, during the Vietnam War. The movie also starred Robert Duvall, Martin Sheen, Laurence Fishbourne and many others.

Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Love means never having to say you’re sorry”

TODAY’S MOVIE DIVA OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. KIM HILLYARD. INCREDIBLE SOLVING JOB KIM! 👌👌👌👌💯

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….

A part of the body is hidden in each of the following sentences. The first sentence contains “head.” Can you find the rest?

1. The ad is for Monday’s sale.
2. The tour group can go to either country.
3. My car makes funny noises sometimes.
4. Sarah and Tony are getting married.
5. That casino seems shady.
6. Can’t you see that Hank needs help?
7. The sea is so calm out here.
8. Would you like to go surfing, Erin?

Answer: 1. head
2. toe
3. arm
4. hand
5. nose
6. knee
7. mouth
8. finger

Thursday’s Quizzler is…….

In each equation below, part of a common name has been replaced with a definition for a word that is contained within that name. By answering the definition and completing the equation, you will find the name.
(Ric + difficult = ric + hard = Richard)

1. Put on clothes + ald
2. Fishing pole + ney
3. P+ make a mistake + y
4. Be in debt + n
5. That girl + r + adult guy
6. D + eager
7. B + lease an apartment

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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