Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Friday August 30, 2019
Today we honor those individuals who are out of the office and have left
the best out of office automatic email replies! 

1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.

2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn’t have received anything at all.

3. Sorry to have missed you, But I’m at the doctor’s having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.

4. I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

5. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

6. The email server is unable to verify your server connection. Your message has not been delivered. Please restart your computer and try sending again.

7. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

8. Hi, I’m thinking about what you’ve just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.

9. I’ve run away to join a different circus.

10. I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as ‘Kate’ instead of Dave.

Think about it, whats your outlook email reply? That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Labor Day Weekend people and whatever you do, don’t
forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!  

Quotes of the Day
“Police are looking for a woman who stole $3,000 worth of cat-grooming
supplies at an airport baggage carousel. Police describe the suspect as ‘single.'” -Seth Meyers

“For a lot of children, the party known as summer is over. Don’t worry, kids.
School will end eventually and then you’ll get to go to a different kind of school
called work, and it only ends when you get old and die.” -Jimmy Kimmel

“In Saudi Arabia, a 14-year-old boy was detained for dancing to the Macarena.

You know, I don’t say this often but I’m going to side with the
Saudi government on this one.” -Conan O’Brien
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….

Because an increasing number of people are having heart
attacks while gambling, the big, high-class casinos are
now equipped with sophisticated defibrillators. They are
computer-controlled to deliver the exact electric shock
needed to revive a heart attack victim. That is, if you’re
at a big, high-class casino.

At the cheaper casinos downtown, they just drag you across
the carpet and touch your finger to the doorknob. 😱😁😎




Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “Love means never having to say you’re sorry”

Answer:  “Love Story”
“Love Story” is a 1970 film that stars Ali MacGraw as Jennifer Cavalleri and tells of the love and life of two young people, the boy from a wealthy background and an ordinary working-class girl, who meet, fall in love and marry. Tragically she dies and her husband again utters the quote to his father at the end of the film. The movie also starred Ryan O’Neal as Oliver and Ray Milland as his father. Tommy Lee Jones made his debut in this film in a very small role.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “I’m making out the report now. We haven’t quite decided whether he committed suicide or died trying to escape.”


Thursday’s Quizzler is….

In each equation below, part of a common name has been replaced with a definition for a word that is contained within that name. By answering the definition and completing the equation, you will find the name.
(Ric + difficult = ric + hard = Richard)

1. Put on clothes + ald
2. Fishing pole + ney
3. P+ make a mistake + y
4. Be in debt + n
5. That girl + r + adult guy
6. D + eager
7. B + lease an apartment


1. Don + ald = Donald
2. Rod + ney = Rodney
3. P + err + y = Perry
4. Owe + n = Owen
5. She + r + man = Sherman
6. D + avid = David
7. B + rent = Brent

Friday’s Quizzler is…….

Beethoven was a lover of teasers of all kinds, and often submitted the following to his friends.

What word can be created when following these directions?

1) Start at D.
2) Go up Eight.
3) Go down Eleven.
4) Go up Five.

What word is it?




LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at


CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at, The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store.






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