Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

WELCOME to Wednesday September 18, 2019

Obtainable Affirmations……

1. As I let go of my feelings of guilt, I am in touch with my inner sociopath.

2. I have the power to channel my imagination into eversoaring levels of suspicion and paranoia.

3. I assume full responsibility for my actions, except the ones that are someone else’s fault.

4. I no longer need to punish, deceive, or compromise myself, unless I want to stay employed.

5. In some cultures what I do would be considered normal.

6. Having control over myself is almost as good as having control over others.

7. My intuition nearly makes up for my lack of self judgment.

8. I honor my personality flaws for without them I would have no personality at all.

9. I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me.

10. I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a wonderful Wednesday people and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!

Quotes of the Day

“Now we sit through Shakespeare in order to

recognize the quotations.” – Orson Welles

“No man is exempt from saying silly things; the

mischief is to say them deliberately.”- Michel de Montaigne

“Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately?

I say that what we really need is a car that can be shot

when it breaks down.” – Russell Baker

“The Postal Service is facing a $7 billion budget short fall this year.

So in addition to closing the post offices, they’re also raising the price

of a first-class stamp. It will now be $4,000.” –Jimmy Kimmel

“New York is a great town, though. If you’re here and want a one of

a kind souvenir be sure to take home the police

sketch of your assailant.” –Dave Letterman

Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….

Ten useless inventions…….

1. Non stick Cellotape
2. Solar Powered Flash Light
3. A black highlighter pen
4. Glow in the dark sunglasses
5. Inflatable Anchor
6. Smooth Sandpaper
7. Waterproof sponge
8. Waterproof Teabags
9. AC adapter for Solar powered calculators
10. Fireproof Matches
11. Fireproof Cigarettes
12. Battery powered Battery Charger
13. Seatbelts for Motorbikes
14. Hand powered Chainsaw
15. Inflatable Dartboard
16. Silent Alarm Clock 😁

Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “I am in a dress, I have gel in my hair, I haven’t slept all night, I’m starved, AND I’m armed! Don’t MESS with me!”

Answer: Miss Congeniality! These words were said by Gracie, to her colleague, Eric, following her overnight transformation into a woman worthy of entering the Miss United States pageant. The plot of the 2000 film, “Miss Congeniality”, revolved around FBI agent Gracie Hart’s (played by Sandra Bullock) transformation into a Miss United States pageant candidate. Despite her tomboy habits, with the help of mentor, Victor Melling (played by Michael Caine), Gracie managed to not only pass for a real candidate, but also foil a terrorist attempt.

Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???“But the thing is, um, what I’m trying to say, very inarticulately, is that, um, in fact, perhaps despite appearances, I like you, very much. Just as you are.”

Tuesday’s Quizzler is….

Here are more movie alternates, but this time they are a bit more challenging.
Use synonyms of the following phrases to decode popular movie titles.

1.) Razors of Honor
2.) Wonder-male Comes Back
3.) Ruler of the Bands
4.) Endless Light of the Unstained Head
5.) Super Quartet
6.) Mandibles

Answer: 1.) Blades of Glory

2.) Superman Returns

3.) Lord of the Rings

4.) Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

5.) Fantastic Four

6.) Jaws

Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….

I live above a star, and yet I never burn,
I have eleven neighbors, and yet none of them turn,
I am visited in sequence, first, last or in between,
PRS (& sometimes Q) are my initials,
Now, tell me what I mean.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/

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