Friday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Friday October 11, 2019

TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1) Growing up is mandatory; growing old is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do
while you’re down there. (my favorite…)
4) You’re getting old when you get the same sensation
from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It’s frustrating when you know all the answers but
nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.

7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great weekend people and
whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
Quotes of the Day
“She got her looks from her father.
He’s a plastic surgeon.” – Groucho Marx

“The great thing about democracy is that
it gives every voter a chance to do something stupid.”
– Art Spander
“If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts;
but if he will be content to begin with doubts
he shall end in certainties.” – Sir Francis Bacon
“I’m trying to figure out what to give my lady friend for her
birthday. They say diamonds are forever – what says ‘this is
for the next month and a half’?” –Craig Kilborn

Remember…a developer is someone who wants to build a house

 in the woods. An environmentalist is someone who already
owns a house in the woods.” –Dennis Miller
“An undefined problem has an infinite
number of solutions.” – Robert A. Humphrey
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes…. 
30 Signs You’re No Longer A Kid…

1. You’re asleep, but others worry that you’re dead.
2. Your back goes out more than you do.
3. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
4. You buy a compass for the dash of your car.
5. You are proud of your lawn mower.
6. Your best friend is dating someone half their age…and it isn’t breaking any laws.
7. Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
8. You sing along with the elevator music.
9. You would rather go to work than stay home sick.
10. You constantly talk about the price of gasoline.
11. You enjoy hearing about other people’s operations.
12. You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.
13. You make an appointment to see the dentist.
14. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

15. Neighbors borrow your tools.

 
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
 “If you build it, he will come.”
Answer:  Field of Dreams!

Ray Kinsella hears a voice that tell him, “If you build it, he will come.” He begins to think that he should build a baseball field in the middle of his farm. While his wife is skeptical, she lets him go on with his dream, in spite of the risks of going bankrupt. Did you know? The character of Terence Mann was based on author J.D. Salinger. Also, the field still exists. People still travel to Dyersville, Iowa to play ball.

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Now, you’ve got a corpse in a car, minus a head, in a garage. Take me to it.”
Thursday’s Quizzler is….​
Each of the clues below describe a name of a candy.
Can you name that candy? Example: Earth’s neighbor = Mars.

1. Quiet giggles from the back of the room
2. Infant child of The Sultan of Swat (2)
3. Cow juice / cowboy clothes (2)
4. Baby chick chirps
5. Male parental unit that plays guitar (2)

Answer: 1. Snickers (or Chuckles)
2. Baby Ruth
3. Milk Duds
4. Peeps
5. Pop Rocks  

Friday’s Quizzler is…….
Determine each person’s first and last name, the color of each package,
what each contained, and what time it was delivered.

Clues:
1. Michelle did not receive shoes and did not receive her package at 1:00 PM. Mr. Jones didn’t receive his package in the afternoon.
2. The button up shirt did not come in a black or purple package. The shirt Michael received is not a sweatshirt. The purple package did not contain shoes.
3. Mrs. Marks, who received her package at 3:00 PM, didn’t receive a light pink package, which was not delivered at 9:00 AM.
4. Kevin’s last name isn’t Johnson and he didn’t receive his package at 4:00 PM. The high heels did not come in the hot pink package and were not delivered at 11:00 AM.
5. The hot pink package was delivered two hours after the button up shirt and two hours before Kara received her package.

6. The order of the appointments is the person who ordered the clogs, Ms. Green and her shirt, the owner whose last name is Smith, the person who received the red package, and Jason.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in MONDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com
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