Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

 

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WELCOME to Thursday November 14, 2019
 
Things you wouldn’t know without help from the movies……
1. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings especially
    if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident.
2. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a
    passing St Patrick’s Day parade at any time of the year.
3. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involved
    martial arts – your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one
    by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their
    predecessor.
4. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
5. It’s easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the
    control tower to talk you down.
6. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames.
7. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will
    ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of
    the building without difficulty.
8. All single women have a cat.
9. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be
    necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

10. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
Quotes of the Day
“Always be nice to your children because they are
the ones who will choose your rest home.” – Phyllis Diller

“If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play at it,
it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.” – Bob Hope
“There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing
 on the shore like an idiot.” – Steven Wright
“Experts say this global warming is serious, and they are
predicting now that by the year 2050, we will be out of party
ice.” –David Letterman
“In New Jersey hunters will soon be able to hunt bear.
Hunting of bears is being made legal. A word to New Jersey residents
– running over a bear in your Camaro is not hunting.”–Craig Kilborn
“I have to talk to my girlfriend every day on the phone. My husband says,
‘Why do you have to talk to her again today? You just talked to her
yesterday. What could you possibly have to tell her?’ ‘Well, for one
thing, I have to tell her you just said that.'” –Rita Rudner
 
 
 
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….  
A prospective juror in a Dallas District Court was surprised by the definition of
voluntary manslaughter given the panel: “An intentional killing that occurs while
the defendant is under the immediate influence of sudden passion arising from

an adequate cause, such as when a spouse’s mate is found in a ‘compromising
position.'” “See, I have a problem with that passion business,” responded the
jury candidate. “During my first marriage, I came in and found my husband in
bed with my neighbor. All I did was divorce him. I had no idea that I could
have shot him.” She wasn’t selected for the jury.  😱😳😁
 
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? 
“Hey, I like that hat, man. They sell men’s clothes where you got that?”
Answer: Footloose!

This is one of the first things Ren (Bacon) says to Willard (Penn) after Willard calls him out on bumping into him in the hallway, on Ren’s first day at school. After becoming friends, Ren, Willard and Ariel (Singer) try to change their town’s strict laws on dancing. Ren can not understand why dancing is such a problem until he learns of the fatal accident of Ariel’s older brother, involving alcohol and music.
 
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Death by stereo!”

Wednesday’s Quizzler is….​
Dennis, Emily, Katrina, Rita, and Wilma are five friends who went to elementary school together. However, in 6th grade, each of them moved to a different state or country and are now starting to forget where each person is living, what water sport each person likes, and which natural disaster fascinates each of them. Can you help them sort out their homes and hobbies?

Friends: Dennis, Emily, Katrina, Rita, Wilma
Locations: Mexico, Texas, Cuba, Alabama, Florida
Hobbies: Waterskiing, Scuba Diving, Surfing, Kayaking, Swimming
Natural Disasters: Avalanches, Hurricanes, Tornadoes, Earthquakes, Tsunamis
1. The five friends are Emily, the waterskier, the hurricane and avalanche fanatics, and the Texan.
2. If Dennis is the Cuban, then Emily is the Mexican. If Dennis is the hurricane lover, then Rita loves avalanches. One of these statements is true.
3. Katrina and Dennis are the waterskier and the hurricane fanatic.
4. The waterskier, surfer, and scuba diver live in Mexico, Cuba, and Texas and are fascinated by tornadoes, tsunamis, and earthquakes.
5. The Floridian, who is not Katrina, likes kayaking and avalanches.
6. The surfer, the diver, and Dennis used to hang out with Wilma afterschool.
7. Emily loves earthquakes and Rita loves tsunamis.
8. Rita has known the surfer since first grade.

Answer: Dennis lives in Cuba, waterskies, and loves tornadoes.

Emily lives in Mexico, surfs, and loves earthquakes.
Katrina lives in Alabama, swims, and loves hurricanes.
Rita lives in Texas, scuba dives, and loves tsunamis.

Wilma lives in Florida, kayaks, and loves avalanches.  

 
 
 
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
Eating white is what I mostly do

If quick enough, a fruit and some things blue
When you see pink, sky blue, orange, or red
It would be wise to turn my yellow head
In a dark room with blue walls
I run from the ghosts that roam the halls

What am I?

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

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