Monday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

Screenshot_2019-01-31 Instagram
WELCOME to Monday November 25, 2019
 
Defining Different Heights… 
Height of Isolation: Two people sitting side by side using e-mails to communicate with each other.
Height of Cowardice: Two persons fighting through e-mails.
Height of Helplessness: Receiving no e-mails for a week.
Height of Frustration: The email server being down.
Height of Carelessness: Writing a love email and doing a ‘Send All.’
Height of Achievement: A person sending email to a girl wanting to become friends & getting a reply.
Height of Time-pass: A person sending email to himself.

Height of Expectation: Sending Indian cricket team an e-mail, wishing them to win a match.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people and whatever you do,
don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
Quotes of the Day
“Today is Pancake Day, the day that we remember and pay tribute
to all of the pancakes that have died in my stomach.”-Jimmy Kimmel

____________________________________________________________________________
“Now, I don’t want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God’s way
 of letting you know that you’re having too good a time.” –Dennis Miller
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“Buzz Aldrin was on ‘Dancing With the Stars.’ He may be the only man to
have walked on the moon and moonwalked in the same lifetime.” -Jimmy Kimmel
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“Search crews in Montana are looking for two bags of mail in the wilderness that
fell out of a plane last week. Meanwhile, a bunch of squirrels were excited to
learn they’d been pre-approved for a Discover Card.” -Jimmy Fallon
 
 
 
 
 
 
Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….  
Even with a thousand games, dolls and crafts to choose from, my customer 
at the toy store still couldn’t find a thing for her grandson.  “Maybe a video or
something educational?” I asked. “No, that’s not it,” she said.  We wandered
the aisles until something caught her eye: a laser gun with flashing lights 
and 15 different high-pitched sounds.  “This is perfect,” she said, beaming.
“My daughter-in-law will hate it.”  😳😱😁👍
 
 
 
 
Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? 
 “Come on, Norman, they’re openin’ up the bar.”
“We’ve just got to get organized. We’ve got to get organized!
Answer: Pretty Woman!

In this scene businessman Edward Lewis (Richard Gere) has just negotiated a fee of three thousand dollars for a full week of prostitute Vivian Ward’s time (Julia Roberts). Vivian thinks she has outnegotiated Edward and says line one but Edward replies with line two. Edward has traveled to Hollywood, California to conclude a business deal and, after a chance meeting while asking directions, wants to hire Vivian to accompany him to some social functions. The interaction of Vivian’s street-savy mannerisms with Edward’s rarified level of society leads to some pretty funny situations. In the 1991 Academy Awards, Julia Roberts was nominated for Best Actress in a Leading Role but lost the Oscar to Kathy Bates in “Misery.” This was Ralph Bellamy’s final movie (he played businessman James Morse, who owned the shipyard that Edward was planning to purchase).
Monday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Come on, Norman, they’re openin’ up the bar.”
“We’ve just got to get organized. We’ve got to get organized!
TODAY’S MOVIE DIVA OF THE DAY AWARD GOES TO MS. KIM HILLYARD. INCREDIBLE SOLVING WORK KIM!🙇‍♀️🙌👍👍👍
 
 
 
Friday’s Quizzler is….​
The following word pairs are anagrams which can be combined to form the name of an animal.Try to figure it out.

1. Zeal, Gel
2. Neat, Help
3. Boa, Luff
4. Bow, Mat

5. Evil, Owner

Answer:  1. Gazelle.  2. Elephant.  3. Buffalo.  4. Wombat.  5. Wolverine. 
 
 
 
Monday’s Quizzler is…….
Four legs have I, a sturdy fellow

A fuzzy back that isn’t yellow
But (often) green or (rarely) red
A den is where I make my bed
My keepers feed me colored balls
With sticks they store on my den walls
Sometimes I store them in my pouch
Sometimes deep in my belly; ouch!
That’s when you’ll see me acting strange
Instead of balls, I’ll eat your change
And that’s my cue to feed again

Chalk it up to hunger, friend!

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK OUT MY BOOK online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com
 ​

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