Thursday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Thursday January 2, 2019
 
Thought Provoking Statements…….
I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?
I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a butthead from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
There’s no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time! 
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!  
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Quotes of the Day 
“Congress is considering a bill that would force advertisers to
 lower the volume of their TV commercials. OK, how did my
mother get in Congress?” -Jimmy Fallon
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“Food addicts are the people I feel sorriest for because that’s really
hard. You need to eat. You don’t need to do drugs. Very hard for these
people to quit. “I’m going cold turkey… mmmmm turkey. Do not think
about food… do not think about food… do not… nuts…” -Craig Ferguson
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“According to a survey by nationwide mutual insurance, 2 percent of people
 actually shave while they’re driving. They shave! How many guys would like
 to be in the car with those women?” –Jay Leno
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“There’s a doctor in Britain who lets his patients watch their favorite
DVD during surgery to distract them, and avoid the need for general
anesthesia. Here’s how it works: it doesn’t.” – Jimmy Fallon
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“You can’t deny laughter. When it comes, it plops down in your
 favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.”
– Stephen King

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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
Do I look that shady? I just got a GPS for my car, and my first trip with it was to a drugstore. Since the manual said

not to leave it in the car unattended, I brought it with me into the store. While there, the GPS came alive, and a voice

stated, “Lost satellite contact.”  I wasn’t embarrassed until a woman turned to me and said, 

“Your ankle bracelet monitor is talking to you.” 😳

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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
“I am leaving soon, and you will forgive me if I speak bluntly. The universe grows smaller every day, and the threat of aggression by any group, anywhere, can no longer be tolerated. There must be security for all, or no one is secure. Now, this does not mean giving up any freedom, except the freedom to act irresponsibly.”
 
Answer:  The Day the Earth Stood Still’
 Klaatu, accompanied by an eight-foot tall robot named Gort, arrives to warn Earth’s world leaders that they need to mend their ways (this was at a time when the Cold War looked like hotting up), explaining that the citizens of other planets are concerned about the use of nuclear arms. Of course, he is almost immediately shot by frightened soldiers, but is healed before he escapes to live among the people and find out what they are like. As the search for him intensifies, he asks his companion to deliver the famous message “Klaatu barada nikto”, a phrase whose meaning has never been definitely determined, but which seems to be a message calling for mercy towards Earth if anything should happen to him. She says this to Gort as the robot collects Klaatu’s body, and takes it back to the spaceship where Klaatu is (temporarily) brought back to life so that he can deliver his final warning to the people of Earth.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears. I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him. The evil that men do lives after them. The good is oft interred with their bones. So let it be with Caesar.”
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Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
In this word pyramid you have to take the letters from the word pea and put them around the ‘h’ to
form a new word. Once you have the next word, do the same with the next line.

pea
h _ _ _
s _ _ _ _
_ _ r _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ n
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ l
 
Answer:  Pea

Heap
Shape
Phrase/seraph
Sharpen

Shrapnel


Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
Each group of three definitions describes three words that are spelled the same, except for one letter
(each group describes a different set of words). Example: king, ring, wing.

1a) a bone in the leg
1b) arboreal mammal, common to Madagascar
1c) to take exception or object
2a) a mixture of liquids, as for medicine
2b) a liquid preparation for cosmetic use
2c) an opinion or view
3a) something having a spiral or twisted form
3b) to hold back or restrain
3c) the thick part of coagulated milk
4a) to beat or damage with repeated blows
4b) to trade by exchange of goods
4c) good-natured witty joking
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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