Wednesday’s Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers and Teases!

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WELCOME to Wednesday February 12, 2020
 
Dictionary of Evaluation Comments.  Some of you might like to know what the supervisor is really saying in all those glowing employee work performance evaluations s/he keeps cranking out.
AVERAGE: Not too bright.
EXCEPTIONALLY WELL QUALIFIED: Has committed no major blunders to date.
ACTIVE SOCIALLY: Drinks heavily.
ZEALOUS ATTITUDE: Opinionated.
CHARACTER ABOVE REPROACH: Still one step ahead of the law.
UNLIMITED POTENTIAL: Will stick with us until retirement.
QUICK THINKING: Offers plausible excuses for errors.
TAKES PRIDE IN WORK: Conceited.
TAKES ADVANTAGE OF EVERY OPPORTUNITY TO PROGRESS: Buys drinks for superiors.
INDIFFERENT TO INSTRUCTION: Knows more than superiors.
STERN DISCIPLINARIAN: A real jerk.
TACTFUL IN DEALING WITH SUPERIORS: Knows when to keep mouth shut.
APPROACHES DIFFICULT PROBLEMS WITH LOGIC: Finds someone else to do the job.
A KEEN ANALYST: Thoroughly confused.
NOT A DESK PERSON: Did not go to college.
EXPRESSES SELF WELL: Can string two sentences together.
SPENDS EXTRA HOURS ON THE JOB: Miserable home life.
CONSCIENTIOUS AND CAREFUL: Scared.
METICULOUS IN ATTENTION TO DETAIL: A nitpicker.
DEMONSTRATES QUALITIES OF LEADERSHIP: Has a loud voice.
Hey I’m just saying! That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a
wonderful Wednesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget
to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
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Quotes of the Day 
 
“I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many
things, and I have succeeded fairly well.” –Robert Benchley

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“Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we
need are ovations where the audience members all punch and
kick one another.” –George Carlin
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“There’s a huge hole in the whole Flood drama, because anything
that could float or swim got away scot-free, and it
was the idea to wipe out everything, He didn’t say, “I will kill
everything, except the floating ones and the swimming

ones, who will get out due to a loophole.” –Eddie Izzard

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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
At a friend’s wedding, everything went smoothly until it was time
for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle.
The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests. When asked
afterward why he behaved so badly, he explained,
“I was just trying to be a good ring bear.” 😳😁😎
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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ” 
‘Oh, I’ve chosen my words carefully, Persian. Perhaps you should have done the same!’ ‘This is blasphemy! This is madness!’

Answer:   ‘300’
‘Madness…? This is Sparta!’ Don’t stand too close to the edge of the well if you are the messenger facing the King (Gerard Butler). The king kicked the messenger into the well after he had threatened the King, insulted the Queen (Lena Headey), and suggested slavery for all Spartans. ‘300’ was released in 2006 and was about 300 Spartans fighting to their death against thousands of Persians in 480 BC at Thermopylae.
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
‘If there’s anything in the world I hate, it’s leeches – filthy little devils!’
 
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Tuesday’s Quizzler is….​
 The blanks below can be filled in with words spelled with the same four letters in different order. Find them.

There once was a musical, _ _ _ _.
It was performed in three _ _ _ _.
When it was through,
The audience flew
And all of the _ _ _ _ went _ _ _ _.
Answer:  There once was a musical, CATS

It was performed in three ACTS
When it was through,
The audience flew

And all of the CAST went SCAT. 

 
 
 
Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
Sandra is one of five sisters, all of different ages. They each have a unique interest and favorite color. On top of that, the 5 girls all like a different food! Their parents are hopelessly confused as to what each girl likes, but they DO know some facts. Help them remember who’s who from the following clues:

1. The tennis racket belongs to the 10-year-old.
2. Belinda loves her violin, which she started playing when she was 4.
3. The 5 girls are: Loren, the cat-lover, the 6-year-old, Jenny, and the one who likes purple.
4. Miriam is only allowed to have one cat, partly because Jenny is afraid any more will scare away her many boyfriends.
5. The family Picasso, Loren, is said to be going through her “Blue Period” – everything she owns is blue!
6. Many of Loren’s paintings have been created while eating ice cream, her favorite food.
7. The 3-year-old still eats applesauce, but the 6-year-old likes her newly discovered snack, chips, better.
8. Jenny found she liked salad, after an attempt to go on a diet.

9. Belinda thinks she plays better in orange surroundings, but the 13-year-old likes pink better.

LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases!  Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
RECOMMENDED WEBSITE LINKS:
CHECK THIS BOOK OUT online at https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FF669PT/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1531337765&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Banquet+Servers+Hand+Guide#, Amazon.com: The Banquet Servers Hand Guide (Basic) eBook: Euclid Strayhorn: Kindle Store. http://www.amazon.com

 

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