WELCOME to Thursday February 13, 2020
Thinking Out Loud….
* Money doesn’t bring you happiness, but it enables you to look for it in more places.
* Your conscience may not keep you from doing wrong, but it
sure keeps you from enjoying it.
* Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
* Misers aren’t much fun to live with, but they make great ancestors.
* Be careful what rut you choose. You may be in it the rest of your life.
* The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.😁
* When you see the handwriting on the wall, you can bet you’re in a public restroom.
* Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
* The real reason you can’t take it with you is that it goes before you do.
* Junk is something you throw away three weeks before you need it.
* Hospitality is making your guests feel at home, even if you wish they were.
* A closed mouth gathers no feet.
* A man (or woman) who can smile when things go wrong has
found someone to blame it on.
* A modern pioneer is a woman who can get through a rainy Saturday
with a television on the blink.
* The world is full of willing people: some willing to work and some willing to let them.
* Money isn’t everything….there’s credit cards, money orders, and travelers checks.
Hey I’m just saying! That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a
great Thursday people and whatever you do, don’t forget
to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
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Quotes of the Day
“Doritos is reportedly looking into launching a so-called lady-friendly
chip that doesn’t crunch as loudly. Because there’s no more appropriate
snack for the #MeToo era than a chip that tells women to be quiet.” -Seth Meyers
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“A new study found that the amount of man-made heat that’s absorbed by
the ocean has doubled since 1997. The main source of that heat? That kid
who’s waist deep at the beach with that weird smile on his face.” -Jimmy Fallon
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“I read today Best Buy and Target are planning to stop selling CDs in their stores.
To which I say: Best Buy and Target are still selling CDs? For those too young to
remember, CDs were these shiny discs that would get scratched almost immediately
and would sit in a binder of the back seat of the car until you sold the car.” -Jimmy Kimmel
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“A man in Massachusetts went to claim a $10,000 lottery prize and found out that
he misread the ticket and won $1 million. Later, his wife said,
‘Did you get the $10,000?’ He was like, ‘Yes.'” -Jimmy Fallon
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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
A young man who had recently moved out on his own called his mother and announced
excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do?
His mother said, “Why don’t you send her a nice note and invite her to your apartment
for a home-cooked meal?” He thought this was a great strategy, and arranged a date
for a week later. His mother called the day after the big date to see how things had gone.
“The evening was a disaster,” he moaned.
“Why, didn’t she come over?” asked his mother.
“Oh, she came over, but she refused to cook.” 😱😳😁😎
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Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”
‘If there’s anything in the world I hate, it’s leeches – filthy little devils!’
Answer: The African Queen!
‘The African Queen’ was a movie classic from 1951, that was set during WW1. A missionary (Katharine Hepburn) decided to get back at the Germans for her brother’s death by using the steamboat owned by a drunkard (Humphrey Bogart) to deliver a torpedo. At one point, the boat got bogged down and Bogart had to get in the water and pull it along. Of course, he was covered with leeches when he got back in the boat.
Thursday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
‘Look, you fools. You’re in danger. Can’t you see? They’re after you. They’re after all of us.
Our wives, our children, everyone. They’re here already. You’re next!’
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Wednesday’s Quizzler is….
Sandra is one of five sisters, all of different ages. They each have a unique interest and favorite color. On top of that, the 5 girls all like a different food! Their parents are hopelessly confused as to what each girl likes, but they DO know some facts. Help them remember who’s who from the following clues:
1. The tennis racket belongs to the 10-year-old.
2. Belinda loves her violin, which she started playing when she was 4.
3. The 5 girls are: Loren, the cat-lover, the 6-year-old, Jenny, and the one who likes purple.
4. Miriam is only allowed to have one cat, partly because Jenny is afraid any more will scare away her many boyfriends.
5. The family Picasso, Loren, is said to be going through her “Blue Period” – everything she owns is blue!
6. Many of Loren’s paintings have been created while eating ice cream, her favorite food.
7. The 3-year-old still eats applesauce, but the 6-year-old likes her newly discovered snack, chips, better.
8. Jenny found she liked salad, after an attempt to go on a diet.
9. Belinda thinks she plays better in orange surroundings, but the 13-year-old likes pink better.
Answer: GIRL-AGE-INTEREST-COLOR-FOOD
Sandra-10-tennis-purple-macaroni
Miriam-3-cats-green-applesauce
Jenny-13-boys-pink-salad
Loren-8-art-blue-ice cream
Belinda-6-music-orange-chips
Thursday’s Quizzler is…….
A young woman in a restaurant was approached by a tearful old lady who said, “You look so like my
own daughter who passed away last year. Could you do me a favor and say ‘Good-bye, Mother’ when I leave?”
The young woman happily agreed and said, “Good-bye, Mother” when the old lady left. Later she got a shock. What was it?
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in FRIDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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