WELCOME to Wednesday March 4, 2020
Humor……
OLD WANTS never die, they become needs
OLD WATCHMAKERS never die, they just run out of time
OLD WATCHMAKERS never die, they just unwind
OLD WATCHMAKERS never die, they just wind down
OLD WEATHERMEN never die, they reign forever
OLD WHITE WATER RAFTERS never die, they just get disgorged
OLD WOOL COATS never die, they just become mothballed
OLD WRESTLERS never die, they just lose their grip
OLD YACHTSMEN never die, they just keel over
WALT DISNEY didn’t die, he’s in suspended animation
There is no conclusive evidence about what happens to old skeptics, — but their future is doubtful
Hey I’m just saying! That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a
wonderful Wednesday people and whatever you do, don’t forget
to laff it up! Peace, I am outta here! Eucman!
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Quotes of the Day
“Girls are like pianos. When they’re not upright, they’re grand.”
– Benny Hill
“A friend is someone who’s there when he needs you”
– Anon
“Committee – a group of men who keep minutes and waste hours.”
– M. Berle
“I’m gonna live forever, or die trying.”
– Joseph Heller (Catch 22)
“Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law.”
– Hubert Humphrey
“Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do.”
Ronald Reagan
“Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder”
– Anon
“I can see clearly now, the brain has gone”
– Anon
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Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes….
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim,
but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old
beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,”Are there any gators
around here?!” “Naw,” the man hollered back, “they ain’t been around for years!”
“Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway
“Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway
there he asked the guy,”How’d you get rid of the gators?” “We didn’t do nothin’,”
the beachcomber said. “The sharks got ’em.” 😱😳
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Tuesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? ”
“I think it pisses God off when you walk by the color purple in a field and don’t notice it.”
Answer: The Color purple!
Steven Spielberg brought Alice Walker’s story about the life and trials of two black sisters growing up in rural Georgia in the 1930s to the screen in a big budget production that pleased many but couldn’t capture the full breadth and wonder of Alice Walker’s epistolary novel. The quote in question is said by Shug, played by Margaret Avery, to Celie, the protagonist of the movie, played by Whoopi Goldberg, while they are talking to each other about what they have gone through in their lives.
Wednesday’s Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from???
“Scut Farkus! What a rotten name! We were trapped. There he stood, between us and the alley. Scut Farkus staring out at us with
his yellow eyes. He had yellow eyes! So, help me, God! Yellow eyes!”
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Tuesday’s Quizzler is….
Each group of words below is a commonly known phrase. Try to guess what that phrase is.
1.The total entity of substances which exhibit a reflection of light particles in awesome
profusion are not necessarily composed of a soft, yellow metallic substance.
2. A couple offers possibility of camaraderie, while trebly aggregates often have the appearances of a multitude.
3. A member of the class of Aves that energizes rapidly from a state of nocturnal hibernation
is able to seize by force or stratagem the lumbrious terristris.
4. Homo sapiens who inhabit abodes composed of pellucid substances containing
silicon materials should be prudent of casting hard cobbles.
Answer: 1. All that glitters is not gold.
2. Two’s company, three’s a crowd.
3. The early bird gets the worm.
4. People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.
Wednesday’s Quizzler is…….
A spoonerism is a pair of words that can have their initial sounds switched to form new words. The pairs need only sound the same, not necessarily be spelled the same (power saw & sour paw, horse cart & coarse heart). There may sometimes be one or two connecting words (kick the stone & stick the cone, king of the rats & ring of the cats). Given the following definitions, what are the spoonerisms?
1) canine fur & porcine challenge
2) rock toss & to pack up royal furniture
3) arsonist’s desire & to battle a fibber
4) underground amphibian & bar rules
LOOK for answers to today’s quizzlers in THURSDAYS, Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also, if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com.https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/
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